Lights
by subcutaneous
Summary: When a beautiful lawyer tries to sweep Kate off her feet, Megan must face her jealous impulses and decide whether or not to take a risk. Set in Season Three. Femslash.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: Thank you once again to the _Body of Proof_ actors and writers for creating these unbelievably addicting characters. As we eagerly await Season Three, I thought I'd try something a little different—but I believe totally plausible—for Kate and Megan. There is another woman involved here, but alas, no worries. It is a Kegan fic after all. Also, tried to include much more action, ala the reports for Season Three. Thank you to my tumblr friends for inspiring me big time on this one, and thank you to my Beta for your endless support and love. Hope you enjoy. Please, please, please, review. Your feedback and enthusiasm keep me writing more!

* * *

Megan stormed into the office Monday morning, a little more fire in her than usual. The night before, one of Lacey's fellow classmates, Sabrina, had been found dead in her room of an apparent drug overdose. She was only fifteen years old.

There had been suspicions for quite some time that the supposedly "safe" private school had its own ring of juvenile drug dealers. Lacey told her mom she didn't know anything, but that she would never be tempted to try drugs anyway. What troubled Megan was that the girl who was now deceased was also a straight-A student with no record of disciplinary action at school and no reported problems at home. Megan was afraid someone slipped the drugs to Sabrina without her knowing. Of course, she had nothing to go on yet, but these were the ideas turning the wheels in her head as she entered the board room for their morning briefing.

Kate leaned with her palms against the table in her green chiffon top and tweed skirt as she waited for the rest of the team to file in. It had been a particularly stressful morning as she fielded calls from the media and dealt with Sabrina Tucker's obviously distraught parents. She hated cases like this more than anything.

Megan was, not surprisingly, the first to arrive. She sat near the head of the table and sighed a greeting to her boss.

"Any leads from Bud yet?" she asked as she removed her burgundy trench, clearly wanting to jump right in.

"Not yet," Kate was sorry to inform her.

"The school's not that big," Megan noted. "I'm sure if we sent someone in undercover, we could…"

"This isn't _Twenty One Jump Street_, Megan," Kate huffed, though she was sympathetic. "Things are a little more complicated when it's a private school, as I'm sure you know. There are rules."

"Yeah, well, it's times like this 'the rules' need to be reexamined," Megan shot back.

"Look, I know this hits close to home," Kate tried to calm her, knowing it was a futile cause. "I'm worried too. But let's get the details first."

Megan took a deep breath and nodded. She and Kate still didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things, but over time, they'd been able to put many of their differences aside. Since helping each other through Kate's run in with the Marburg virus nearly a year ago and Megan's terrifying encounter with Wilson Polley, they'd certainly gotten a lot closer. Kate could anticipate when Megan's emotions needed to be assuaged, and Megan was more understanding of the regulations Kate needed to follow. They respected each other, and that respect manifested itself in interesting ways. Some days, they were strictly business, only speaking when necessary as they worked elbow to elbow in the lab. Other days, they'd end up sitting in Kate's office well into the evening talking about Lacey's latest school project or Ethan's amusing attempts at dating. Still, there was an almost palpable line, a level of professionalism neither of them seemed to know if or when they should cross as their friendship grew deeper. It was an anomaly how quickly they'd gone from being at each other's throats to being someone they knew they could rely on, but neither of them tried to analyze or discuss it. At least not with each other.

Soon the rest of the seats around the table were filled and they got started with the meeting. Curtis was on call the night before, so he'd done the preliminary autopsy.

"Looks like it was a homemade chemical substance ingested through the stomach. Probably some kind of food she ate with the drugs inside," Curtis reported.

_Just what I thought_, Megan mused to herself.

"I'll head over to the school, see what I can weasel out of the kids," Bud offered.

"What we really need is the supplier," Sam continued. "I'll hang back at the station and hit up the database."

"Sounds a little like _Twenty One Jump Street_ to me," Megan mused, eyeing Kate across the table. Kate glared, but couldn't stop the tiniest smirk from gracing her lips.

* * *

By noon, Kate, Megan and Bud were at the school, interviewing students, teachers, administrators, trying to gather any information they could on what parties had taken place that weekend, who the popular kids were, where the troublemakers hung out. No one seemed to have answers for them. The longer they went without any leads, the more anxious and persistent Megan became. Bud finally insisted she wait in the hallway while he wrapped up his interview with the headmaster. Megan scoffed, as usual, but knew better than to challenge him with Kate there as well. She made her way out to the courtyard between the cafeteria and the gymnasium, where she spotted Lacey sitting with some of her friends at a picnic table.

"What are you doing?" Lacey grumbled. Since she'd started high school, she was even more adamant that her mother stay out of her social life, which of course made Megan all the more concerned.

"What do you think I'm doing?" she smiled, looking around the table at Lacey's new friends, none of whose names she knew yet.

"Guys, this is…"

"Megan Hunt," she introduced herself to the teens. "Lacey's mom. And medical examiner for the county."

"Did you do Sabrina's autopsy?" one of the young women, Ashley, asked curiously, though she appeared to be in mourning.

"I wasn't working last night," she shook her head. "One of my colleagues did the initial autopsy, but I'll be working the case as well."

Most of the girls looked riveted. Lacey just looked annoyed.

"Were any of you with Sabrina last night?" Megan continued.

"No," one of the other girls reported. "She went to a party with her boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" Megan's eyebrow rose. "Her parents didn't mention anything about a boyfriend."

"They didn't know," another girl, Courtney, confirmed.

"Any of you know who he was?"

"Justin Thomas," Ashley spoke up again. "He went to Central."

"I see. So it was a Central High party then?"

Everyone shook their heads, except Lacey, who was staring at the sun, wishing she'd burst into flames.

"Alright, ladies. Thanks for your help. Lace, I'll see you tonight."

"Yup," she mumbled. "Bye, mom."

Megan grabbed her daughter by the shoulders and kissed her on the forehead. She didn't care how much shit she'd get for it later. After everything she'd seen and heard this morning, there was no way she was letting her out of her sight without a proper goodbye.

* * *

Megan finally met back up with Bud and Kate in front of the school.

"Three hundred and seventy students and not one of them does drugs. Imagine that?" Bud quipped sarcastically.

"Most of them don't have to get it illegally," Kate added. "Their parents' medicine cabinets are stocked. And if their kids do get caught, they're happy to pay for the records to be expunged."

Bud turned his attention towards Megan. "Why do you send Lacey here again?"

"As opposed to the alternative?" Megan defended herself. "Like Central? Which, by the way, is where Sabrina got the drugs. Not here."

"How do you know that?" Bud asked.

"While you were in there I talked to a group of Lacey's friends. They told me Sabrina had a boyfriend, Justin, who went to Central and took her to a party last night. She must have snuck out."

"Unbelievable," Bud threw his arms up. "They won't talk to me, but they just pour their hearts right out to you."

"You should be used to it by now," she smirked.

"Better head over to Central then," Kate cut in. "Chances are the dealer's already trying to cover his tracks."

* * *

Bud drove himself while the two women rode together. When they arrived at Central a few minutes before him, Megan started giving Kate orders, something she was not keen on but was also getting used to by now.

"Slow down," Megan whispered.

"Why are you whispering?" Kate asked.

"Just…park right there. Trust me, okay?"

She directed her to a space at the back of the lot, where Kate stopped and shut off the engine. Kate watched as Megan lowered her shades over her freckled nose, scanning the parking lot, apparently knowing exactly what to look for.

"I grew up near this neighborhood," Megan explained. "My mother sent me to Highland Academy, of course, but I always wanted to go here. I'd drive by sometimes and check out what 'the cool kids' were doing."

Finally, she pointed to a few students sitting on the back of a red pick-up, obviously skipping class. They slowly got up from their post and headed towards the abandoned racket ball courts on the other side of the parking lot.

"There," Megan breathed.

Without another word, she jumped out of the car and took off in their direction, sprinting as quietly as she could in six inch heels, ducking behind cars as she made her way towards them.

"Megan!" Kate groaned through her teeth, exiting the car and following her, trying to be stealthy but feeling absolutely ridiculous as she clunked over the gravel in her own heels and a skirt too tight to let her run.

"Meg…"

Megan abruptly grabbed Kate's arm and dragged them both behind the nearest SUV.

"Shh!" she stressed, leaning close to Kate's ear, still whispering. "They can't know we're following them."

"We should wait till Bud gets here," Kate tried to reason.

"That could be too late," Megan groaned.

Kate rolled her eyes, though she almost appeared apologetic.

"My investigative skills are a little rusty," she admitted. "Unlike you, I tend to stick within my job description."

"No wonder you miss out on all the fun," Megan smirked.

Kate was a little out of breath and felt herself beginning to sweat just from the effort she'd made to catch up with Megan. As annoyed as she was at how outlandish the redhead's tactics were, she felt herself being pulled along with it against her better judgment. Something about Megan's protectiveness—of Lacey and every other student who was in danger—made her feel like she needed to give her a little room to stretch the rules on this one. Besides, she did feel out of the loop at times. There was something to be said for being more hands on.

Megan seemed to pay no mind to the fact that Kate's back was pressed up against the car door. She practically squatted between Kate's legs, arms planted on either side, as she very slowly peered around the hood of the car. Kate's breath picked up a little as she realized how close Dr. Hunt was. Megan's forearm brushed against her chest, ruffling her blazer. Kate was sure she was completely oblivious to their proximity. As usual, the redhead was fully immersed in her work, missing everything else going on right in front of her.

Finally, Kate cleared her throat. Megan glared at her for a moment before realizing just how close she was. Her cheeks turned a little pink and Kate felt the slightest exhalation of breath against her chin before she stepped back.

"Sorry," Megan mumbled.

"What are they doing?" Kate answered, changing the subject.

"They're too far away for me to see anything," Megan shook her head. "But at least we know their hangout spot. That's something. When Bud gets here, he can take a closer look."

Kate tilted her head to the side, acknowledging Megan's point. It hadn't been a crazy idea after all. Still, she couldn't let her off the hook so easily.

"You know, you and I weren't trained for this sort of thing," Kate swallowed. "You could really get yourself in trouble one of these days."

Megan raised an eyebrow.

"I'm serious," Kate huffed. "You could easily get hurt, or worse, if…"

"You worry too much about 'ifs,'" Megan teased.

"Can't help it. That's my job," Kate shrugged, smiling a little sadly. "I think we've had enough close calls."

Megan looked at her pensively for a moment before motioning for Kate to follow her back through the maze of vehicles.

"Anyway," the redhead sighed when they were back in the car, still keeping an eye on where the kids had gathered as they waited for Bud to show up. "Thanks for the concern. I'll be careful. I promise."

Kate didn't respond. Instead, she continued to sit next to Megan in silence, contemplating why she did in fact worry so much about the woman who drove her absolutely crazy, in more ways than one.

* * *

When Bud arrived, they led him to where the kids were congregating. At the first sight of the three adults approaching, the two young boys and one girl that was with them took off back towards the school. Bud ran after them and caught one of the boys by the collar. The other two stopped running, unwilling to leave their friend behind.

"Why you running tough guy?"

The boy actually didn't look very tough. His glasses started to slide off his face as he struggled to free himself from Bud's grip, clinging to the backpack in his hands for dear life. Megan stepped forward. Kate moved to hold her back for a second before letting her proceed. The redhead grabbed the bag from the kid.

"Wanna tell us what's in there, or should we see for ourselves?" Bud asked.

"No!" the young man whined. "It's just…stuff…there's nothing…"

Megan unzipped the bag and pulled out a comic book and a deck of colorful playing cards. Besides a couple tissues and a barely used notebook, there didn't appear to be anything else inside the pockets.

"If that's all you have, why were you running?" Megan questioned.

"We're skipping," the girl finally spoke up. "We thought you guys were truancy officers."

"We can still report you," Kate cut in.

"Please," the young woman begged. "My parents will kill me if they find out."

"Go to class," Bud told them, releasing his grip on the boy. "And write something down in that notebook for a change."

The three nodded their heads furiously and darted back into the school.

"So much for that theory," Kate smirked at Megan.

"Hey!" she bit back. She hated to be wrong more than anything. "Just because _these_ kids weren't dealing drugs doesn't mean there aren't others who use this space for it."

"Let's just find this Justin kid," Bud interrupted them. "I've got a feeling he's into more than 'Magic: The Gathering.'"

* * *

Not surprisingly, Justin claimed there were no drugs at the party.

"Who told you about me and Sabrina?" he asked angrily.

"One of her friends," Megan responded.

"It was Ashley Wilson, wasn't it?" Justin scoffed. "I should've known she'd try to blame this on me."

"Why's that?" Kate asked.

"Jealousy," he answered, leaning back in his chair with a cocky grin across his face. "Wanted this all to herself."

Kate rolled her eyes. She had tried her best to forget how utterly disgusting teenage boys could be, though she was all too familiar with the equally immature grown men they tended to become.

"Was she at the party last night?" Bud asked.

"Yeah, she was there. Couple of the other girls too."

Megan cursed under her breath. _So Lacey's new friends are a bunch of liar_s, she thought. _Great._

"Did they come with Sabrina, or…" Kate continued to question.

"Nah, they weren't invited. They just showed up with these cupcakes, thinking that would give them a pass."

"What kind of cupcakes?" Megan remembered Curtis saying the drugs had likely been hidden in some kind of food.

"I don't know, frosted, sprinkled, girly-ass cupcakes. You know, cupcakes!" Justin was getting impatient. "Can I go now, please? I told you everything I know. I took her home, helped her climb back through the window, and that was it."

"Your girlfriend is dead," Bud barked at him. "Don't you want to help us find out why?"

"Does it matter?" he started to crack a little, showing he did have a vulnerable side. "She's gone. Nothing's gonna bring her back."

"These cupcakes," Megan continued. "Did Sabrina have one?"

He shook his head no. "She didn't like to eat in front of people."

Megan sighed. _Teenage self-consciousness_.

After they wrapped up with Justin, she and Kate tried to put the pieces together on their way back to the private school.

"If there were drugs in the cupcakes, why didn't anyone else OD?"

"Maybe there weren't drugs in all of them," Megan suggested.

When they arrived back at the school, Ashley, Allison, and Courtney were pulled into the headmaster's office. Megan asked for Lacey to be brought in as well. Even though she hated to make her feel like a suspect—especially since she had been at home the night before, not at the party with the others—she wanted to scare her a little, get her to think twice about which circles she ran in.

"Did you really think we wouldn't find out you were there last night?" Megan asked.

Silence.

"Whose idea was it to put drugs in the cupcakes?" Bud continued.

"What?" Courtney did a poor job of looking shocked.

"Why would you think…" Allison shook her head.

"Enough lying!" Megan jumped in. "Someone did it, and now one of your friends is dead. The question is, why is no one else dead with her?"

"Ashley..." Allison whispered to her friend.

Ashley looked back at her viciously, trying to get her to keep her mouth shut.

"Ashley," Megan began again. "What happened?"

"I…" she couldn't seem to find the words.

"Ashley gave Sabrina a cupcake," Courtney blurted out.

"I didn't think it would be enough to…" Ashley fumbled. "I just wanted her to go home, so I could…"

"Be with Justin?"

The young woman turned bright red as tears began to fall down her cheeks and she shook.

"How does a girl your age become the kind of person who drugs her friend in order to steal her boyfriend?" Bud paced back and forth.

"We'd been doing it for weeks," Allison told them. "It's just supposed to be a…pick-me-up."

"What is?" Kate asked.

"This," she reached into her purse and handed them a small bag of a purple, sparkly powder.

"Allison, Jesus Christ!" Ashley continued to fall apart.

"We're already in trouble!" Allison argued. "Might as well help them stop someone else from getting killed."

"Who gave this to you?" Bud asked.

"Tommy Zepher," Courtney caved. "It's supposed to be like cocaine, only not as strong. And it tastes sweet."

Megan couldn't help but stare at Lacey, wondering if she'd known about this, or even tried the drugs herself. She breathed heavily through her nose and pulled herself together, knowing she'd have time to question her daughter later after grounding her for life.

"So you put it in the cupcakes and brought them to the party," Kate continued. "Did everyone know what was in there?"

"Only a few people," Allison said. "We didn't give them to everyone, just Tommy, and the other guy whose house it was."

"Had Sabrina done it before?" Bud asked.

"No," Courtney explained. "She was afraid. But Ashley made her come outside, told her if she didn't do it, she'd tell her parents about her and Justin."

"She made her eat it in front of us," Allison said. "And then we all went back into the party. After a while, Sabrina said she didn't feel good and Justin took her home."

"And none of you felt the slightest bit of remorse the next day?" Megan spat. "You just went on with your lives, like nothing happened?"

They all looked guilty now, of course. Unfortunately, it was too late for Sabrina.

* * *

Ashley and the other girls, with the exception of Lacey, were taken into custody. Bud called in the squad to head over to Central and arrest Tommy Zephyr, the other boy who had been at the racket ball courts earlier, who they had failed to question. Megan was too upset to gloat about her instincts being right. She was just glad they'd stopped another drug deal before it went down.

"Mom," Lacey spoke softly. "I swear I didn't know."

"Your grandmother will pick you up this afternoon," she told her, almost numbly. "I have to work late. We'll talk about it when I get home."

"I'm sorry," Lacey started to cry. "I liked Sabrina. She and I were new to the group. Now I don't have any friends left here."

"That's just as well," Megan breathed. "Public school might be a better place for you after all."

Lacey nodded, throwing her arms around her mother uncharacteristically. Megan hugged her back before ushering her to class.

Back in the car, Kate looked at Megan, who sat silently for a few minutes, trying to recover from an already exhausting day.

"Sometimes…" Kate tried. "Teenage girls are just…"

"I can't talk about it," Megan shook her head. "Not now."

Kate nodded.

"I think I need a beer," Megan laughed a little as she sighed, running her finger along the car window before looking back at Kate. "Care to join me?"

Kate thought about it for a moment. She still didn't know how she felt about socializing with her employees, especially during work hours, but things with Megan were…different. She figured they'd earned it after today.

"Where to?"

* * *

They ended up at a tiny little bar Megan picked, far from the office. Kate couldn't understand why the redhead liked this place. It reminded her of the dives her father used to drag her to when she wasn't nearly old enough. She'd sit on a barstool when she was no more than twelve, playing darts while he drank round after round, enduring her fair share of ogling and the occasional cigarette burn.

"So what's your love life look like these days?" Megan asked boldly.

"Really?" Kate huffed. "That's what you want to talk about?"

"Why not?" Megan smirked. They'd certainly discussed it before.

Kate rolled her eyes.

"It's not nearly as interesting as yours."

"Aiden's been gone for months," Megan reminded her. "Trust me, mine's not exactly thriving."

"I guess I haven't really been looking," Kate admitted. "At least not actively."

Megan commiserated. They were both too busy to put themselves out there.

"Well," Megan took another swig of her beer. "It's nice having someone to share things with, be able to vent a little. Even if you are my superior."

Kate's cheeks turned pink.

"Can't exactly complain about your boss, huh?"

Megan smiled back.

"I don't have much to complain about."

The blonde's blush spread down her neck. She looked away for a moment and ran her hand through her hair, trying to play it off.

"That's a lie, but thanks."

"No, really," Megan insisted. "I know you have your way of doing things, and I have mine. But it works. I think we learn from each other."

Kate licked her bottom lip nervously and finally locked eyes with Megan. It was true. They made a great team. She could admit that much. What she couldn't admit was how much more she had grown to appreciate Megan, beyond the realm of their professional relationship.

She watched the redhead tip her head back and sip from the bottle again, the muscles in her neck working as she drank, her soft, gorgeously layered locks flowing down her shoulders and over her breasts, barely contained by her red cashmere sweater. When she turned her green eyes back to Kate, so full of sparks and tenacity, Kate realized all the things that made her job so much more difficult for the past few years were exactly the things that turned her stomach in knots when they were together. At work, everything about Megan was too much, too intense, and yet somehow on a personal level it was just enough.

Kate tried not to give anything away by staring at her for too long. She had decided these feelings were just something she'd have to deal with on her own, since there was no way she'd compromise her position by going after an employee. She'd fought way too hard to get away from her past to jeopardize her livelihood now, even if it meant denying some of the most powerful urges she'd ever experienced.

"You okay?" Megan finally asked.

"I was just… thinking…about today."

"You're not supposed to be thinking about that right now," Megan scolded playfully.

_If she only knew._

"Look, you've already got me drinking on the clock, which I don't know why I agreed to," Kate started to feel like she needed to put some walls back up.

"I don't know either," Megan mused. "First you let me drag you into running all over the place today, now we're here. I really must be rubbing off on you."

"Yeah, well," Kate rose from the stool. "I think I've had enough 'fun' for one day."

Megan wasn't completely oblivious. She knew there was some kind of tension between the two of them, even if she couldn't put her finger on exactly what it was. All she knew was that she liked spending time with her boss outside of work and appreciated the moments when they were laughing rather than yelling at each other.

"You're right," Megan sighed. "Guess we should head back to the office and finish up. I have to get home to Lacey at a reasonable enough time to deal with this craziness."

"I'm sure she didn't know anything," Kate assured her. "Lacey may be going through her angsty phase, but she's a good girl."

Megan smiled sadly. "I hope you're right."

Back at the office, Megan helped Curtis with the final autopsy reports on Sabrina before notifying her parents of the exact cause of death and releasing her body. Kate sat at her desk long after everyone else left, contemplating her conversation with Megan earlier in the day. She was lonely. She couldn't deny that. And her feelings for Megan seemed to get stronger every time they spoke.

She figured she had two options: either cut off all extracurricular contact with the redhead, or else, find someone to take her mind off what she knew could never happen, like she had done with Todd. She didn't want to completely shut Megan out, so she decided that a good balance of the two should work. She wasn't exactly ready to head out to a lesbian bar, but figured if the opportunity presented itself, she would take it.


	2. Chapter 2

"Who is that?" Ethan whispered to Curtis.

"Nobody you need to worry about," the Deputy Chief assured.

"No, seriously. Is that Dani's replacement?"

"She look like a driver to you?"

"I mean, the leather jacket, just…"

"She's a lawyer," Curtis finally answered.

"She's way too hot to be a lawyer," Ethan scoffed.

"Ethan, I'm surprised at you," Megan shook her head, entering the lab. "I thought you were more evolved than that."

"What?"

"Can't someone be attractive _and_ intelligent?"

"I wasn't saying…obviously…"

"Quit while you're ahead," she patted him on the shoulder.

"Got it."

"But really," Megan turned to Curtis. "Who is that?"

"Not you too," Curtis shook his head. "She's one of Kate's clients."

"Huh," Megan put a hand on her hip as she leaned against a table and watched the woman make her way down the hall. "Didn't realize Kate was consulting these days."

* * *

Erica Rodriguez flashed her brightest smile to the receptionist at the front desk, like they were old friends. Her raven hair swished as she tossed it over her shoulder, shiny layers flowing down the back of her white leather jacket. She walked purposefully into Kate's office, sticking her hands in her pockets as she leaned against the doorframe.

"Can I come in?" she asked, knowing Kate was expecting her.

"Ms. Rodriguez," the blonde rose and shook her hand. "Good to see you again."

"Kate, you keep doing that," the slightly younger woman kept Kate's hand, shaking her head a little as she narrowed her chocolate brown eyes. "You gotta call me Erica."

"Erica," Kate smiled. "Shall we?"

They sat on the couch by the window, where they began going over the details Kate had worked out for Erica's case. She had put together an incredibly detailed portfolio for the lawyer to take back to her firm, and was scheduled to appear on the witness stand for her trial at the end of the month.

"You're really something else, you know that?" Erica smiled, leaning back against the sofa, crossing her legs, letting one of her Loubitains dangle off her foot.

"Thanks," Kate smiled as they wrapped up. "I'm sorry, I should have offered you something. Can I get you a drink? I don't have much here, just…"

"Nah, I think we're good for today," Erica responded. "How 'bout I take you out to dinner tonight instead?"

Kate stopped in her tracks. She turned around slowly, smiled a little and shook her head.

"Thanks, but…"

"But…?"

She took a deep breath and sat on the edge of her desk. Erica had been flirting with her for weeks. Every time they met, she stayed longer than necessary, finding subtle ways to touch her as they worked, complimenting her on her brains and fashion sense. Although most people didn't know it, Kate had some experience with women, so she knew it wasn't all in her head. Still, she was reluctant to make the first move.

"Last time I went out to dinner with a client, things got…complicated."

"How so?"

"We started dating," Kate didn't know why she was telling her this. The woman somehow managed to loosen her up. She definitely had a knack for getting people to relax, which was not a bad trait for a lawyer.

"I see." Erica raised an eyebrow. "How long?"

"Couple months. I should have known better but…it's over. It's been over."

"Well, I'm not gonna lie. It would be a date," Erica confirmed, locking eyes with Kate as she played with her necklace. "But it doesn't have to be complicated."

Kate blushed, shifting from one leg to the other as she appeared to search the air with her eyes, trying to decide whether she should really do this.

"You're seriously asking me out?"

"Is it such a shock? Don't act like you don't get asked out all the time."

"I don't," Kate swallowed.

"I'm sorry," Erica shook her head. "You don't like women. I shouldn't have assumed…"

"I didn't say that," Kate cut her off.

Erica continued to hold Kate's gaze. Kate stared back.

"I realize it was a little bold of me," Erica admitted. "You just seem…I don't know. Open."

"I am open," Kate quickly confirmed. "To dinner."

"I'll take it," Erica smirked. She rose, crossing the room to where Kate was sitting.

"Tonight actually won't work," Kate told her. "Friday?"

"Perfecto."

Kate extended her hand. Erica accepted it, shaking it firmly. There was something deeply enticing about Erica. Her eyes, her strength, her confidence. She had a lot of admirable qualities—much like Megan—but different, obviously. Kate tried her best not to make comparisons. The point was to get her mind _off_ Megan, after all.

Erica let go of her hand and moved in closer. Kate's breath caught a little as Erica leaned forward and kissed her very softly on the cheek.

"Call me," she whispered. "We'll set it up."

Kate nodded and watched as Erica left, hips swaying a little as she made her way to the elevator.

_An easy distraction_, she thought, though something within tugged at her not to do this again. She let her eyes wander towards the lab, watching through the glass as Megan slapped Curtis across the head. The man glared at her, then laughed as Megan scrunched up her nose at him. Kate shook it off and returned to her desk, determined to call Erica the next day.

* * *

Friday evening, Kate met Erica at Cabo Blanco, a Cuban restaurant downtown. Apparently, the place had a great reputation for being authentic, and the live band brought in quite a crowd. Still, it was pretty casual. Kate was afraid she'd overdressed.

"Stunning, as always," Erica looked over Kate's navy silk dress, greeting her with a kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks," Kate smiled, taking in Erica's low-rise jeans and black tank, which showed off her exquisitely tanned and toned shoulders. The shirt was lower cut than she'd seen her in before, revealing that Erica was just as curvaceous as Kate, if not more so.

"You look…amazing," Kate continued.

"I try," Erica joked. To some, her confidence may have come off as cocky, but Kate found it to be very genuine, almost comforting.

After ordering dinner and being served their first round of margaritas, the two started to slip into easy conversation.

"So how'd you become head honcho over there?" Erica asked.

"I climbed the latter. Worked my way up from M.E.," Kate explained. "It wasn't easy. Plenty of good people wanted the job."

"But you got it," Erica smiled, taking another sip from her drink. "I have a feeling you're very good at getting what you want."

Kate rolled her eyes a little, but the color in her cheeks told Erica the flattery was working.

"You could say that."

"Where'd you grow up?" Erica continued.

Kate's demeanor changed. She took a large gulp through her straw, licking a little salt from the rim.

"Nowhere interesting," she tried to play it off.

"Don't worry," Erica shook her head. "My childhood wasn't a fairytale either."

Kate paused. She hadn't felt comfortable telling anyone about her past in quite some time, but she suddenly felt ready, thinking it might be a relief to talk to someone who could relate.

"My mother left when I was six," Kate spoke softly. "Drugs. My father didn't know what to do with me. Actually, he didn't know how to do much of anything, except drink."

"No wonder you climbed that latter so fast," Erica smiled, leaning a little closer across the table. "You're a survivor. Like me."

"Yeah?"

"I came from nothing too. Well, not nothing, just less than I knew I wanted," Erica told her. "Parents came over from Cuba, no education, poor neighborhood. It was my mission in life to make it out."

"And here you are," Kate smiled.

"That's right," Erica raised her drink. "Here _we_ are."

They clinked their glasses together and each took another sip. Soon, their food arrived, which Kate had to agree was some of the best Latin cuisine she'd ever tasted. As the evening grew later, the band really started to strike up. When they played "No Es Una Novela," Erica threw her napkin on the table.

"Damn, I love this song," she sighed. "Come on. Dance with me."

Kate turned beet red and shook her head adamantly.

"I don't think so."

"Come on," Erica insisted. "Don't be nervous. I'm not that good."

"Yeah, right," Kate scoffed.

"What? You think every Cuban knows how to dance, don't you?"

"I…no…"

"Racist," Erica smirked.

Kate rolled her eyes.

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response."

"It's okay," Erica laughed. "If you dance with me, I'll forgive you."

Kate took a deep breath and looked at her, still a little unsure. Erica finally stood and reached out her hand. Kate swallowed, then accepted, trying to tell herself she'd hopefully never see any of these people again as she followed Erica to the dance floor. The brunette locked eyes with her and smiled brightly, assuredly. She wrapped her right arm around Kate, placing one hand on her lower back, and kept their left hands clasped.

"I know you're not used to following anyone, Chief, but you're gonna have to let me lead."

Kate couldn't help but laugh. The situation was so preposterous. She looked around for a moment to see if anyone was staring at them. She wondered how many other women Erica had brought to this place, then quickly let it go, needing to pay attention to how their feet were moving.

"Good," Erica commended. "See? Not so bad. I'll probably step on you eventually, though. I apologize in advance."

Kate laughed again. She hadn't laughed this much since she was with…

_Don't_, Kate told herself, chasing away all thoughts of the redhead, focusing instead on the woman in her arms. Almost as if she were reading her thoughts, Erica chose that moment to pull her closer, bringing their bodies flush as they continued to move to the Bachata beat. Kate felt Erica's fingers sliding ever so smoothly over the small of her back, and she brought her chin to rest on the crook of Erica's shoulder. Their cheeks touched as they swayed, shifted, danced like it was only the two of them there. Erica pulled back a few seconds after the song ended.

"You were great," she whispered.

"Likewise," Kate smiled, still holding the brunette's hands.

"Ready to get out of here?" Erica asked.

Kate nodded. She fought with Erica about splitting the bill for a good five minutes before letting her pay this time. When they got outside, Kate leaned against the door of her car while Erica stood in front of her.

"I hope that wasn't too far out of your comfort zone," Erica mused.

"I had a great time," Kate told her. It was true.

"So you'll come back with me then?"

Kate nodded.

"In that case," Erica stepped closer, letting her denim-clad thighs just barely rub against the front of Kate's silk dress. The blonde took a look around again before lacing their fingers. Erica smiled famously, then closed the distance between them, kissing Kate once, very softly, which surprised the blonde. Kate went for it, bringing a hand to the back of Erica's neck and pulling her in for a much harder, full-fledged lip lock. Her juicy lips slipped over Erica's, and the brunette brought her hands to Kate's waist, squeezing before pulling away.

"Until next time," Erica kissed her once more before letting go. "Sweet dreams, Chief."

"You too."

Back home, Kate thought about how easy tonight had been, shockingly, as opposed to the fireworks she was used to. She couldn't remember the last time things were this easy. In fact, she was sure they never were. She drifted off to sleep thinking about how nice it was to feel wanted.


	3. Chapter 3

Megan had been rather busy over the past month, especially with switching Lacey into a public school. She'd chosen Haddonfield, not Central, wanting to get her as far away from the drug ring as possible even though she knew there would be dangers and temptations anywhere. Lacey had learned a very painful lesson. She seemed to adapt rather nicely to the new school, and her attitude was shifting back to her old cheerful self. Megan was happy the "angsty phase" appeared to be short-lived.

At the office, there were a ton of cases that came in and were quickly solved, but this latest one was more taxing. An intern at a publishing house was found dead in a storage room by his fellow employees, and the cause of death was proving to be elusive. Megan knocked on Kate's door before entering, still in her lab coat and scrubs.

"Kate, I need to run some additional tests on Ellis Freidman. Initial hypothesis was negative, so I'm going…"

"Sure," Kate peered over the documents she was reading at her desk.

Megan paused. Her nose crinkled up as it did when she was puzzled. She narrowed her eyes and took a few steps forward.

"That's it? Just…sure?"

Kate finally put down the folder and looked up at Megan.

"What do you want me to say?" she shrugged.

"Nothing it's just…not usually this easy."

"I trust you," Kate smiled reassuringly.

Megan still looked at her like she had three heads.

"You do?" she mused. "Good."

"Send me the report when you're finished," Kate continued to grin, before returning her gaze to the files.

Megan couldn't let it go. She'd noticed Kate had been in a much better mood recently, and figured this was as good a time as any to find out why.

"You've been all smiles the past couple of days," Megan noted. "Who is he?"

Kate rolled her eyes, but continued to smirk. She knew it would be better to keep it to herself, but…

"If you must know," the blonde sighed, knowing full well she had every intention of telling Megan all along. "Her name is Erica."

"Erica?" Megan felt her stomach drop ten inches within her body. Her eyebrows shot up. "You mean….like…a woman…Erica?"

"Yes," Kate confirmed matter-of-factly.

Megan decided to take a seat.

"Wait…" she spoke more softly. "So you're…"

"Not constrained by gender when it comes to relationships? No."

"Huh."

Suddenly, Megan began flashing back to a million little moments between them. Arguing, making up. Arguing, making up again. Teasing each other over coffee in the break room. Touching unnecessarily as they reenacted scenarios in the lab. Getting undressed together during the quarantine for Marburg, though they'd turned their backs. Crying in front of her in the hospital lobby when she'd heard "Rocket Man" on the radio. Holding her hand when she thought she might lose her.

_The thought of losing her._

It was a dizzying flood. She had never fathomed that there could be anything more, certainly not…_Did she say?_

"Relationship?" Megan swallowed. "Taking things pretty fast, aren't you?"

"Not exactly," Kate corrected. "We've known each other a couple of weeks. We've only been on one date so far, but it's been…fun."

Megan wanted desperately to know how much "fun." The thought made her skin burn.

"Wait a second," the redhead put her hand up. "Erica? That's not the lawyer you've been consulting? The one Ethan's been drooling over?"

Kate rolled her eyes again, but nodded.

"I see," Megan nodded back, biting her lip. "You must have a thing for lawyers."

Kate scoffed at the dig about Todd.

"Actually, I try to avoid them. That's just who tends to show up."

Megan continued to look at her a little curiously, drumming her fingers against her leather skirt.

"So," she continued, trying to find a seemingly innocuous question. "What do the two of you talk about?"

Kate scowled again.

"Why are you interrogating me?"

"I'm not!" Megan defended. "Forget it, I don't want to…"

"We have similar backgrounds," Kate gave in.

Megan shifted.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning…." she tried to find the best way to say it. "We both know what it's like to struggle."

"Oh, so she's not some spoiled rich kid? Like Todd." _Or me_, she didn't say, but somehow Kate knew it was implied.

"Okay, Megan," Kate put her hands flat on the desk in front of her. She was done for now. "Let's not go there."

"What do you mean?" Megan asked. "I thought we shared things. You and I have known each other for how long now? Going on four years? Sometimes I feel like I don't know anything about you. "

Kate was taken aback. The comment stung. She realized that as much time as they'd spent together, it was true. They really didn't know each other that well. So why did she feel such a strong connection? Rather than show how much it hurt, however, she turned to anger.

"What do you want me say?" Kate raised her voice a little. "What is it that you _need_ to know about me? That I was probably one of 'the bad kids' you'd watch from your fancy car when you were sixteen? That I could barely afford going to _public_ school half the time? That my parents couldn't have cared less about me? Is that enough?"

"That's a start," Megan spat, though she was sympathetic. "My father killed himself, remember? So before you go judging …"

"I didn't …"

"That's what it sounded like."

"I don't want to argue," Kate sighed. "You needed a test. I gave it to you. Why are we still having this conversation?"

"I don't know," Megan fumed. "But I'm perfectly fine with ending it."

She turned around and left abruptly. Kate looked after her, a little stunned. She knew she had acted inappropriately, but Megan seemed to know exactly how to push her buttons. Still, all the woman wanted was to get to know her better. _Why now? _Kate thought._ Is she actually jealous? _Kate realized that was exactly what she was trying to do, make Megan jealous, as much as she hated herself for it. She hadn't even expected a reaction.

She shook her head, unable to face what any of it meant. Even if Megan did have feelings for her, things were way too complicated. They rarely got along. _Maybe that's because we're both constantly trying to fight it_, she couldn't help but wonder. Regardless, being with Erica was much less of a hassle. With her, everything was already out on the table. She texted her later that afternoon, asking to see her again before their next consultation, to which Erica enthusiastically agreed.

* * *

That evening, Kate found herself in Erica's living room after a very long day.

"You want coffee?" Erica asked, sitting on the couch next to her. "I can make it really strong."

The brunette put a hand on Kate's thigh, over her tan slacks, and began rubbing gently. Kate ignored it for the moment.

"I probably shouldn't this late," Kate swallowed. "Might keep me awake."

"I don't plan on sleeping anytime soon," Erica smiled, tracing her nails down to Kate's knee, then back up her leg. "Do you?"

_Uncomplicated_, Kate thought. This was exactly what she wanted. This was exactly what she wanted to want.

She turned to Erica with a look that meant she was game. Erica buried her hands in Kate's wavy blonde locks and pulled her in, kissing her hard, but with enough finesse to make Kate's temperature rise a bit. She returned the kiss, letting her tongue slip inside Erica's mouth, attempting to push her back against the arm of the couch so she could straddle her, but Erica was much too fast and a lot stronger. Before Kate knew it, she was laying on her back and having her neck sucked, nibbled, while Erica's hands traveled down her shoulders, then her arms, only stopping when they reached her hands. Erica pulled them around her. Kate took the opportunity to lift the woman's shirt over her head, revealing a black lace bra with breasts threatening to spill over. The blonde attempted to lick the swells hovering above her face, but Erica pulled up, just out of reach, and smirked, still pinning Kate's hands.

"You're not used to this are you?" Erica noted.

"What?" Kate mumbled as she closed her eyes and felt Erica's hands working their way under her sweater, sliding over her stomach then climbing the mounds of her breasts, resting there for a moment.

"Not being in control," Erica bit Kate's bottom lip as she squeezed, letting her thumbs slip below the lace and brush teasingly over her nipples. Kate arched her back and squirmed a little but refused to moan, refused to give in as much as her body needed.

"Tell me what you want," Erica whispered, dragging her teeth against Kate's ear.

"I want…" Kate managed to speak as Erica conducted a symphony with her tongue against her pulse point. "To feel."

"Feel?"

"Yes," Kate sighed, digging her nails into Erica's shoulders. She couldn't believe she was allowing herself to be topped. It was not in her nature, but she needed to go on autopilot right now.

"Like this," Erica let her hand slip between them, tracing her nails past Kate's belly button, over her zipper, into the warm space between her thighs, pressing down against the fabric. Kate's eyelids fluttered again, and she shifted into Erica's fingers, tilting her head back until she couldn't see her. She tried to get lost in the feeling of being taken, but for some reason, it was not working as well as it had in the past.

_Taking things pretty fast, aren't you?_ She heard Megan's voice in her head even as she felt Erica's hot breath against her stomach and the top button of her trousers coming undone. Kate ignored the voice, letting her pants slip down her legs. She was way too secure in her sexual autonomy to feel judged.

_I thought we shared things._

Kate put one hand over her eyes, as if somehow that would help block out the images of red and ivory that flashed behind her lids, the piercing looks and sensuous smiles. Nothing seemed to work.

Except for her phone ringing just as Erica was about to remove her underwear.

"I have to get that," Kate grumbled.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," the blonde said a little more pointedly.

Erica sighed, sitting up, knowing better than to argue with that tone.

Kate reached down into her purse next to the sofa and pulled out her cell. It was Peter.

"We've got a body at the racetrack," he told her. "How quickly can you get here?"

"Um," she looked at the time and her state of undress. "Thirty minutes?"

"Hurry," Peter sighed. "Megan's already on her way."

Kate took a deep breath and hung up. She turned back to Erica, who was looking defeated, but only a little.

"I have to go," Kate whispered. She tried to sound more disappointed than she felt.

"Duty calls," Erica smiled, kissing her again briefly. Kate smiled too. The woman really was fantastic. "Think you'll be back?"

"I wouldn't wait up," Kate said as she stood, pulling her pants back on and fixing her hair.

She leaned down and gave Erica one more kiss before heading out.

* * *

When Kate got to Philadelphia Park, Peter was already snapping pictures. She spotted him and Megan near the lake at the center of the racetrack, across the grassy area at the interior. She quickly made her way over the dirt and onto the green, her tan coat blowing in the wind as a light snow fell.

As she approached, Megan turned around. They hadn't spoken since earlier in the day when they'd fought. Kate tried her best to appear unfazed by the snowflakes landing adorably in Megan's hair. Somehow the moon brought out the gold flecks in her green eyes, giving her skin just the right lighting. The redhead looked at Kate briefly, nose twitching a little from the wind, before she turned back to the lake. Kate's heart sunk.

The water had almost turned to ice. The thinnest layer of slush covered the surface, except for the hole near the side where they were standing, through which a face floated to the top.

"Who do we have?" Kate asked, knowing they likely hadn't made an ID, but needing to say something.

"Either someone who works here or knows someone who does," Megan answered. "Considering the park's been closed for months."

Kate nodded, watching as the crew from the police department worked at fishing out the body. She turned around and stared at the track, remembering the first time she was there. She must have been at least eleven. Her father usually left her with one of the neighbors, but if they weren't available, he had no qualms bringing her to the smoke-filled hall while he wasted away most of the money they needed to eat. She would choose the horses by name, sitting silently by as her father devised his own strategies, which ultimately failed. Though she knew better than to offer him advice, her picks usually won. She realized then she had some kind of luck, even if her present circumstances indicated otherwise. She imagined herself sitting in one of the expensive boxes at the Derby, drinking champagne in a big floppy hat while she raked in her winnings. It seemed like a long shot in comparison to the paint-chipped table she sat at then, eating Saltine crackers she'd sneak away from the raw bar while Frank Murphy chugged back another one, growing angrier and angrier.

Kate was jerked away from her thoughts as she felt herself slip, her heel sinking into the wet mud. She gasped as she momentarily saw herself falling into the cold, dark water. Megan threw her arms around Kate's waist and pulled her back, steadying them against the railing. Kate's heart jumped into overdrive at the surge of fear, embarrassment, and longing. Megan's fingers dug into her back as she held her close, refusing to let go until she knew she could stand on her own.

"You okay?" she asked.

Kate shook her head yes, though she was still trying to catch her breath.

"Weren't you the one who said we've had enough close calls?" Megan smirked, slowly releasing her grip, smoothing her hands down Kate's arms and patting her on the shoulder. Kate's cheeks burned wildly.

"I'm alright," she coughed. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it," Megan turned back to the lake, where they were finally pulling out the form of a woman from the icy water.

Kate felt the loss of Megan's touch so deeply it made her shiver more than the weather. She tried to look for any remaining signs of warmth on Megan's face, only noting that her cheeks were red too.

"Megan," Kate swallowed. "Earlier, this morning, I didn't mean to…"

"No worries," Megan huffed a little coldly. "You're right. It's none of my business."

"But we're not just colleagues," Kate tried to do damage control. She wanted Megan to care. "We're… friends. I shouldn't have jumped on you like that."

Megan shifted. Kate watched the corners of her mouth turn up.

"Friends don't have to tell each other everything," Megan mused.

Kate's eyebrow rose. "Well, no. But the important things."

"Like who we're attracted to?" Megan glared at her playfully.

Kate rolled her eyes and laughed a little. She was sure Megan was referring to her sexual orientation. She had to be, but the double entendres were a little much, considering.

"Two cases at once," Bud shook his head as he joined them. "We haven't solved the Ellis Friedman murder yet, and now this."

"I guess there's no chance they're related?" Peter chimed in as he wrapped up his survey of the scene.

"Unlikely," Kate answered.

"We just happen to live in a city where people don't like each other very much," Megan joked ominously.

Once the body was loaded into the van, they all retreated to their various posts, determined to solve at least one of these murders by the end of the week.


	4. Chapter 4

As it turned out, one of Ellis Friedman's colleagues stole his manuscript and tried to publish it as his own. When Ellis found out, it was too late. The book was being printed and would hit stands in a few weeks. Ellis threatened to sue, but rather than face the scandal and all out ruin of his career, the thief poisoned Ellis's coffee, leaving him in storage to be found the next day. It ended up being rather simple, though no less disturbing, once they figured out the cause of death and nailed down a motive.

Angelica Lawson—the multiple horse-owning millionaire found in the lake at Philadelphia Park—on the other hand, was proving to be a much more challenging case. She shouldn't have been anywhere near the track during the off season, and no one claimed to have seen her enter the premises. The pressure was mounting as the Commissioner told Kate her team better come up with some answers to give the family and the media, fast.

To make matters worse, it was only a few weeks until Christmas. The department was supposed to host a holiday party for all of the M.E. offices in the surrounding counties. Everyone was looking forward to it, but Kate knew she'd have to pull the plug if they couldn't wrap up this case in time.

"Doesn't look good," Erica noted as she leaned against the door to Kate's office, holding a single red rose.

"Erica," Kate's eyes shot up at her. Her cheeks turned pink and she did a quick glance through the windows before rising, ushering Erica inside and closing the door. "What…"

"The look on your face," Erica continued. "That's the look I get when I feel like I'm about to lose in court."

"Sorry. I'm just…"

"Did you forget about our meeting today?" Erica asked. "I haven't heard from you since last week. I figured you were busy."

"Yes," Kate sat on her desk, shaking her head. "It's been… unbelievable. Too much."

"We could reschedule for tomorrow, it's just the trial's next week," Erica stepped close, handing over the flower, which Kate finally accepted. "And, to be honest, I missed you."

Kate was beginning to feel incredibly guilty. She smelled the rose and looked up at Erica, who was sexier than ever in her black pencil skirt and crisp, white button down blouse. She was always so put together, even in jeans and a t-shirt, let alone her couture. Kate's eyelids betrayed the conflict growing within, narrowing seductively as she allowed Erica to kiss her on the cheek, then on the lips.

"I'm just a little overwhelmed right now," Kate admitted. "I don't think I've ever had this much on my plate at once."

"Why don't you take a break?" Erica suggested. "There's this lunch place not far…"

"I can't," Kate interrupted. "I've got a staff meeting in less than an hour and a conference call at four. I'm just not…"

"I get it," the brunette backed off a little, though she really did seem to understand.

"Erica," Kate began. "I'm not sure right now's the best time for...us. Obviously, I'm all over the place, and I…"

"Hey," Erica grabbed her hand. "You don't have to explain anything."

"No?"

"No. You didn't want complicated. I respect that."

"You do?"

"Of course," Erica confirmed. "I don't want it either. I hope I didn't give any other impression."

Kate looked back at the rose, then at Erica again, raising an eyebrow.

"Ah," Erica smiled. Kate couldn't help but melt just a little when she did. "That's just who I am. I believe in treating women right."

Kate rolled her eyes, even as she let Erica continue to hold her hand.

"I suppose I should take lessons from you," Kate smirked.

"You don't need any help," Erica grinned. "Let's just work today. How does that sound? And when you've got time again…outside the office… we can pick up where we left off."

She raised Kate's hand to her lips and kissed it. Kate blushed, giving in to being treated nicely. She still wasn't used to it, but knew it wouldn't kill her.

"Okay," she sighed.

The two completed their preparations for Erica's case. When they were finished, Erica gave Kate another brief kiss on the cheek, and they agreed not to distract each other until Kate's caseload lightened and the trial was over.

* * *

Megan saw Erica get off the elevator and walk into Kate's office. She hid partially behind a cubicle in the lab, trying not to be obvious as she watched their interactions. Kate didn't appear to be very happy at first, but then, after a few minutes, seemed to loosen up. Megan's stomach cramped as she watched the brunette kiss Kate on the cheek. The cramps turned to full on torture when they kissed on the lips.

_What is wrong with you? _She screamed at herself. She realized when Kate dated Todd it made her jealous, but she assumed it was simply because of the circumstances. Even though they weren't as close as they were now, she felt like her friend had gone behind her back and done something that "girlfriends" simply did not do to each other. Still, she hadn't cared at all about Todd. The little surges of jealousy she felt when Kate was all dolled up to go out to dinner or to an art gallery opening with him were easily played off as anger, when really there was so much more to it than that.

Now, staring her right in the face was the nightmare she never wanted to acknowledge. That she would have given almost anything to be the one kissing those luscious lips, holding Kate's chin while she savored every second of being immersed in her. She wanted to look into her eyes longer than just a couple of seconds, without the fear of giving away how much she wanted to touch her, wanted to just be near her.

She realized she had crushes over the years on girls here and there, but always chalked it up to admiring who they were, not wanting to be with them. It was never like this, and it was almost maddening because it made no sense and yet it made perfect sense. They understood each other. They knew what it was like to put work first and suffer for it personally, but they did it anyway because they both loved science and helping people. They both had good hearts, despite the often misunderstood exterior they showed to the world. They came from vastly different backgrounds, as Megan recently learned, but they had both fought on some level to get where they were today. The truth was Megan admired everything about Kate. She only wished she could show her how much.

Jealousy did funny things to her head, made her feel bolder and little more irrational than usual. After she watched Erica leave, she gathered up a bunch of files for the staff meeting and made her way down the hall, past Kate's office. She peered out of the corner of her eye, trying to see if the blonde would notice her. Sure enough, she looked up.

Megan remembered something she'd seen in a movie once. Right then, she didn't care how cliché it was. She smirked devilishly to herself, took a deep breath, and dropped the stack of files all over the floor. Very, very slowly, she bent over in her incredibly tight and dangerously short red lace dress before smoothing her hands over her ass and holding it down as she squatted to pick everything up.

Seconds later, the blonde joined her on the floor.

"It's not like you to be clumsy," Kate sighed.

"Sorry," Megan told her. "I was distracted.

"Makes two of us," the blonde mumbled under her breath.

Megan looked up at Kate's flushed cheeks. Had it really worked?

"Oh. What distracted you?" Megan asked. _Too much_, she thought. She got nervous and decided to play it safe. "Erica?"

Kate shook her head as they stood and she handed the stack to Megan.

"Guess you saw that, huh?"

"I'm sure everyone did," Megan gulped, trying to act cool. "It's okay. The boss is allowed to be human."

"Even so, I don't want to make a habit of it," Kate kept blushing, running her fingers through her hair.

"Why not?" Megan continued to shoot herself in the foot. "Happiness looks good on you."

Kate's face could not have turned any redder. She looked like she might pass out from the effort it took to stop from grinning like a school girl.

"I'll…keep that in mind. Thanks," she nodded, before stepping back in to her office.

Megan smiled victoriously as she made her way towards the conference room.

* * *

A few days later, they got a break in the Angela Lawson case. Apparently, her husband found her having an affair with one of the stable hands and thought he'd frame her lover by disposing of her body in the lake at the track. The only thing that had given him away was the fact that the stable hand had gone home to Nicaragua for the winter, making the husband's testimony incongruous with his allegations. That, and DNA evidence was finally found on the victim's body once her skin thawed.

Erica's first degree murder trial was also a success. Albert Koslowski's head had been decapitated from the rest of his body. Kate was able to determine the length and diameter of the blade that took his life, and with her expert testimony, Erica secured a conviction. Sentencing wouldn't be for another couple of weeks, but for now, she was beyond pleased with the outcome.

"Congratulations," Kate shook her hand in the corridor of the courthouse. "You did it."

"Wouldn't have been possible without your help," Erica shrugged. "I owe you. Big."

Erica wiggled her eyebrows a little. It was cute. Kate blinked a few times and licked her lips as they began to walk back to their cars.

"You've already paid me for my services," Kate reminded her. Consultation fees were not cheap.

"Not in full," Erica eyed her again suggestively. Kate was not immune. No matter how strong her feelings were for Megan, she couldn't deny Erica's appeal, or the fact that she grew more sexually frustrated each day. _What are you waiting for?_ She thought. If this really wasn't supposed to be complicated, why couldn't she just sleep with Erica? She'd had sex without loving someone more times than she could count, so she couldn't quite figure out why this was any different. But it was. Maybe she cared more for Erica than she initially thought, which was why she decided it would be best to continue to take things slow.

"I have to go back to the office and tie up some loose ends," Kate told her when they reached the parking lot. "But, next week we're having our Christmas party…"

She trailed off as she watched Erica's face change.

"What?"

"You want me to come to your Christmas party?" Erica asked. "As your date?"

Kate froze. She was afraid she had inadvertently crossed the line.

"Is that…too complicated?"

Erica's perplexed look slowly morphed into her usual glorious smile. She narrowed her eyes a bit and took a few steps forward.

"I have a confession," Erica whispered, brushing the back of her knuckles against Kate's cheek before pushing some of her blonde hair behind her ear.

"Yes?" Kate smirked, even as she began to sweat.

"Maybe complicated's not such a bad thing," she breathed. "I know what we said before, when things were crazy. But maybe I do want more. How does that make you feel?"

Kate tried not to look like she was panicking on the inside, but she could feel her heart beating in her ears. This was not what she had expected, and yet, part of her felt like she owed it to herself, and to Erica, to try. She was afraid this may be her one shot at being happy.

"Why don't you just come to the party with me?" Kate swallowed, looking down at their hands. "And we'll see how it feels."

"Deal," Erica finally kissed her. Kate agreed to call her later in the week with the details.


	5. Chapter 5

Friday night, a week before Christmas, the Philadelphia County Medical Examiner's Office hosted its holiday party after all. Kate rented one of the larger conference halls a few floors up for the occasion, pulled some strings with a couple of decorators she knew, and had the place absolutely decked out as a winter wonderland. Lights, trees, Hanukah bushes, candles, ornaments, and all the other usual garb were very tastefully strewn about the room, along with a good-sized Italian feast catered by Le Castagne.

It wasn't Kate's thing to scramble around at the last minute hammering out the kinks. She paid people to do that for her. She was happy to show up right on time at eight o'clock, after running home to change into her stunning satin, evergreen cocktail dress and picking up Erica on the way back to the office. Erica wore a white pantsuit that Kate was sure would put any of the men in suits to shame. When the two walked in, all eyes turned to them, including Megan's.

Megan said she'd just be wearing her black and white polka dot dress from that day, so Kate asked her if she'd come down a few minutes before eight to make sure everything was flawless. Megan hadn't been surprised that it was. She knew Kate was a perfectionist, and would only hire people who understood that. Kate had failed to mention, however, that she would be bringing Erica to tonight's gathering. Megan stood by the open bar, ordering her first cocktail with Ethan, Curtis and Peter in tow, eyeing Erica's arm wrapped around Kate's waist, her hand coming to rest on her lower back, inches above her ass, as they made their entrance.

"Make it a double," Megan told the bartender.

"Someone's not plannin' on driving tonight," Curtis guffawed.

"I'll take a cab," Megan bit back.

"I just can't catch a break, can I?" Ethan whined.

"What do you mean?" Peter asked.

"I mean, look at that. Even Kate's got better skills with the ladies."

"If that's what you want to call it," Megan mumbled sarcastically as she took a gulp from her rum and Coke.

The three men brushed her off, continuing to stare at Kate and Erica as they made their way through the crowd, greeting all of the guests from adjunct M.E. offices. As they approached the local crew, Megan downed the rest of her drink and quickly ordered another.

"Erica, these are my wonderful colleagues," Kate smiled, much more bubbly than usual. Megan still had her back turned as she grabbed her drink, so Kate couldn't see her mocking everything she said.

"Pleasure to meet you," Ethan shook Erica's hand, tripping a little. He wasn't expecting her grip to be so firm.

"I've heard all about you guys," Erica winked. "Sounds like on top of cracking cases, you manage to have a lot of fun around here."

"We do," Peter turned up the charm.

"When our boss allows it," Megan finally rejoined the group, smiling painfully.

"Erica, this is Megan Hunt," Kate tried to stay even-keeled, but felt the energy in the room shifting uncomfortably.

"Ah," Erica shook her hand. "I've most certainly heard a lot about you."

"Only the worst things, I hope," Megan smirked. "I can't say I've heard too terribly much about you. Just that you're a lawyer."

"That's right," Erica responded confidently. Kate was beginning to fume inside, but she knew Erica could handle herself. "Prosecutor."

"Kate's always had a thing for lawyers," Megan continued, taking a long, awkward sip from her drink between jabs. "Funny, I used to have a thing for lawyers too. My ex was one. In fact, so was Kate's."

"Megan…" Curtis tried to rein her in, but to no avail.

"Interesting," Erica nodded, her smile fading, although she stood her ground. "We haven't had that conversation, though I'm not too concerned."

"Well, I'm sure you'll get to it at the rate you're going," Megan smiled again, practically seething.

"I think I see the Commissioner," Kate interrupted, redder than the bulbs on the Christmas tree.

"Nice meeting you," Erica said to the group, giving them her best smile. "Ethan, work on that handshake."

"Uh huh," Ethan nodded, frozen in fear amidst the crossfire.

As she and Erica walked away, Kate looked over her shoulder at Megan and shot her a death glare. Megan simply downed the rest of her second rum and Coke and stared back at Kate over the rim of her glass.

"What the hell was that?" Curtis asked.

"What?" Megan replied.

"I know you ain't stupid, so don't play dumb," he continued. "Why would you…"

"Curtis," Peter shook his head, putting a hand on the man's shoulder. "Do those two even need a reason? It's what they do best."

"_What?"_ Megan scowled.

"It would be nice if you and Kate could call a truce that lasted for longer than ten minutes," Ethan laid it out for her. "At least for the holidays."

"I second that," Curtis added. "It's like having your parents fight on Christmas morning while you're trying to open your presents. Ya'll need to pull it together."

Megan shook her head, refusing to get into it with them. Instead, she headed to the ladies room to check her lipstick and regroup.

* * *

While Megan was in one of the stalls, she heard two sets off heels enter the restroom, followed by Kate's voice and the Commissioner's. She quickly pulled her feet up and held her breath, hoping they wouldn't notice she was in there.

"What do you think you're doing?" Beverly scolded.

"I'm not sure what you mean," Kate began, a little timidly. Megan's heart clenched as she listened.

"You don't get paid to flaunt your 'lifestyle' in front of half the state's M.E.s," Beverly continued to cut into her. "You get paid to be in charge."

"Um…I beg your pardon, but I don't see how you can tell me…"

"I _can_ tell you," Beverly interrupted. "And I am telling you. Don't do it, Kate. You want people to take you seriously? I'll be retiring one of these days. You really think I'd put someone up to take my position who brings someone as infamously promiscuous as Erica Rodriguez to the department's holiday party? That's a reflection on me. Now I don't care what you do in your personal life, but if your career is as important to you as I thought it was you'll get rid of her. Now."

There was silence. Megan prayed to all that was good and holy she could keep her balance on the seat.

"Understood?" Beverly demanded a response.

"Understood," Kate breathed. Megan could hear the tremble in her voice. The only time she'd heard Kate like this was when she was sick. She shook her head as she tightened her fists against the walls.

Finally, she heard both women leave and the door close. She waited a couple of seconds before exiting the stall, washing her hands quickly, and stepping back out into the party. She made it just in time to see the elevator door close with Kate inside as she headed down to their office level. Without another thought, she pressed the button and waited for the car to come back so she could follow her.

* * *

Kate made it to her office and closed the door just as the levies broke behind her eyelids and she gave in to sobs. She hadn't cried like this in years, hadn't let herself go, but the Commissioner's words were too much for her right now when she was already in a fragile state. She'd worked so hard to put this party together, on top of everything else she was dealing with professionally and personally. Beverly didn't even pay her one compliment about the affair, only inflicting her usual strain of venom. At the same time, Kate couldn't help but hear the part about Beverly thinking she had what it takes to be her replacement one day. She knew she needed to do some serious thinking about what that meant, and what she was willing to give up in order to attain that almost unfathomable level of success.

"Kate," Megan's voice broke her out of her reflections. Kate turned around sharply and glared at her, trying to wipe away her tears as fast as they were flowing.

"Oh my god," Kate huffed. "Please, go away. I cannot handle…on top of…"

Megan couldn't stay away, no matter how much she knew Kate wanted her to right now. She stepped close to the blonde and took a deep breath, putting her hands on her shoulders. Kate tried to shrug her off, continuing to look down at the floor, but Megan very patiently stood in front of her and refused to leave. Finally, she tried again, bringing her hands to Kate's shoulders and squeezing softly.

"You have every right, _every right_, to be yourself," Megan told her, trying not to choke up. "In fact, it would be a sin not to be exactly who you are, because the world needs brilliant, charismatic women like you, women who know how to do it all, who can lead by day but still have enough sense to make a life for themselves outside of this. You don't have to be ashamed. You don't need to hide, because people need to see this. They need to see how incredibly complex and amazing you are. I don't know what century Beverly Travers thinks she's in, but she can't just talk to you like that and get away with it."

Kate finally opened her eyes and slowly looked up. Megan stared back at her, green eyes glistening even more than usual. She couldn't believe the things she'd just said to her. She had no idea how she'd heard the Commissioner's remarks, but she didn't care. No one, not even Erica, had explained her to herself like that, had made her feel like she had a right to just… be.

Kate glanced down at Megan's lips, which were growing redder by the second as she darted her tongue out against them, licking nervously. She noted how the muscles in Megan's neck moved as she swallowed, flanked by red curls falling so imperfectly it was perfect. Kate's chest heaved. She tried to gather her thoughts before she said or did something she'd regret, but couldn't bring herself to do anything. Megan eventually let go of her arms and took a step back. Kate wanted to completely fall apart, but didn't.

"Erica's a lucky girl," Megan whispered, tracing her fingers across the top of Kate's desk. "I shouldn't have been so rude earlier. I've been terrible."

"Megan," Kate wanted her to stop.

"No," Megan continued. "You deserve this. You deserve to be happy. I'm happy for you."

Kate knew she was trying to be genuine, but she still didn't completely believe her. From the look on Megan's face, it was clear she didn't completely believe herself.

"Thanks," Kate shook her head, wiping a small tear from the corner of her eye. "I need to get back up there."

"Take your time," Megan told her. "Everyone's fine. You did a great job planning this party, no matter what anyone else says."

Kate smiled sadly. Megan started to leave, then gripped the door frame and turned around. She gave Kate the most affectionate smile she'd ever seen. It absolutely obliterated her heart, and the second Megan left she went to pieces again.

She tried her best to get herself under control, grabbing the box of tissues on her desk and dabbing her eyelids furiously while she breathed in and out. Just as she was feeling ready to face the crowd again, Erica found her.

"Sorry," Kate told her. "I just…the Commissioner…"

"I saw," Erica looked at her seriously.

"You did?" Kate sniffed. "I can't believe she had the nerve to lecture me while…"

"Not you and the Commissioner," Erica interrupted. "You and Megan."

Kate froze. She leaned back against the desk again for support, feeling like she might sink through the floor.

"What…what did you see?"

"Enough," Erica sighed, though she didn't appear to be angry.

"That's a little vague," Kate was growing frustrated. "We were just talking."

"It was more than talking. There was touching. And looking. I've never seen you look like that. Not at me."

"That's ridiculous," Kate vehemently denied it. "Megan works for me. I would never…"

"Kate, please," Erica held up her hand. "I don't want to do this with you. I've enjoyed our time together. I'd rather you be honest, let me bow out gracefully."

Kate shook her head. The tears threatened to fall again. She was doing exactly what she promised herself she wouldn't, letting herself get way too emotional, at work of all places.

"If you ask me," Erica continued, sitting on the desk next to Kate. "Seems like Megan can hold her own. She works _with_ you, not beneath you."

Kate knew it was true. Megan wasn't some fresh-out-of-med-school resident, someone who she had absolutely no equal footing with. Even though Kate was technically above her in the chain of command, they'd blurred the hierarchy from the beginning.

"I think that people like you and me, who grew up the way we did…sometimes we're afraid to think we can have it all," Erica spoke softly. "So we sell ourselves short, never going after what we really want. Personally, I learned how to break the habit years ago. That's why I went after you. But I can see you're not quite there yet. You need someone to remind you that you've made it out of that dark place, and you're never going back. So whatever it is you want, go for it. If it means I need to walk away so you can get it, I will."

Kate could not believe how calm Erica was, how supportive. For a moment she was offended that she didn't seem to care, but quickly realized she cared a great deal, more than Kate felt she deserved. Erica was right. She hadn't given herself enough credit, hadn't allowed herself to dream past paying the bills and getting to a certain level of security. Her feelings for Megan made her feel like all of that could come crashing down, but maybe that wasn't true. Maybe she could have everything, including love.

That was it. She loved Megan.

She knew it for quite some time. When she was in the hospital dying from the virus, the only person she wanted to see was Megan. She wanted her face to be the last thing she remembered before she slipped into the coma, the last person whose voice she heard before it took her life.

Somehow, through all of the fighting over the years, they had grown comfortable with one another. Megan refused to give up on her, telling her she wouldn't leave, holding her hand and making her feel like she was a person worth saving. Since then they'd had their ups and downs, but through it all she realized she never feared Megan was going anywhere.

"I'm…so sorry," Kate told Erica, taking her hand and squeezing it gently. "You're an amazing woman. You deserve so much more than this."

"I know," Erica smiled. "So do you."

Kate walked her to the elevator and they exchanged a long, very warm hug and Erica gave her a kiss on the cheek before taking a cab home. When Kate finally got back up to the party, she scanned the room for Megan, but the redhead was nowhere to be found. Checking the time, Kate realized how late it was and that she probably needed to get home to Lacey. She tried her best to push all thoughts of Megan from her mind as she began mingling again. She'd just have to wait for Monday to see how ready she was to take the next step.


	6. Chapter 6

Megan took the weekend to work at suppressing all of her feelings for Kate. She realized how selfish she had been. It was obvious the woman was under more pressure than she could imagine. If being with Erica made her happy, she didn't want to stand in the way. Thinking back, Kate had only been supportive of her own ventures in dating. Derek Ames, Aiden. There hadn't been very many, but Kate had nothing but kindness and encouragement for her during those two brief stints.

She, on the other hand, had acted like a raging, jealous lunatic twice now, even if the first had been somewhat warranted. She had to face it: the chances of her and Kate ever getting together were slim to none. Whatever tension there was between them would simply have to remain that: tension. Nonetheless, she planned to work very hard at easing the fire between them, _if_ she could help it. She wasn't yet entirely convinced.

"Did you need something?" Kate asked as Megan stepped into her office. She'd been looming for a few minutes.

"Actually," Megan began slowly, smiling as casually as she could. "I wanted to see how you were doing. I know I left before you came back to the party on Friday. I hope things got better."

Kate swallowed, remembering every painful detail from Friday night, along with every realization. She hadn't taken as much time to sort through it all yet.

"I'm fine," she smiled briefly. "Thanks."

"Did you tell Erica I apologized for my bad behavior?" Megan continued. "You of all people know how rare that is."

Kate sighed. Apparently, they were going there, whether she was ready or not.

"Um…" she began, fidgeting nervously in her seat as she rested her elbow on her desk, scratching a little behind her ear. "Erica and I aren't seeing each other anymore."

"Oh," Megan heard the word fall through her lips in slow motion. She felt like a bomb had gone off, and she was in no way prepared for it. She had been willing to throw in the towel, taking Kate's happiness into consideration over her own. Now, she didn't know what to think.

"It wasn't anything I said, was it?" Megan continued. "Or…the Commissioner?"

_Leave it to Megan to make this about her_, Kate thought. Unfortunately, she was somewhat right. She shook her head though, deciding not to share the details.

"It just wasn't meant to be," Kate brought her other elbow onto the desk, resting her chin in her hands, trying to act nonchalant about everything. "That's all."

"Okay," Megan sighed, taking a seat across from the blonde. "So… does this mean you're going back to dating men?"

Kate laughed a little as she smirked and rolled her eyes, a bit softer than usual. Megan swallowed.

"That's not really how it works."

"I wouldn't know," Megan admitted, a little defensively. "I've never been with another woman. I guess I'm just…you know…curious."

Kate brought her hands to her lap. She shifted again before looking Megan directly in the eye.

"How curious?" Kate practically whispered.

Megan thought she would be engulfed in flames. Surely this was hell. It had to be.

"If I'm being honest…" she sighed, swallowing again visibly, brushing her fingers through her red mane before returning Kate's gaze. "Very curious."

Megan watched the blonde lick her lips again as the corners of her mouth twitched. Her neck was red, the muscles tensed. She appeared to be at about the same level of agony as Megan. Somehow everything had changed. Every moment of subtext was on the verge of being revealed, pulled into the realm of realness before either of them could get a grip on what was happening.

Neither of them could find the words, so they just continued to stare at each other until some random aide knocked on the door, snapping them out of their reverie, dropping a stack of files onto Kate's desk before darting out. Megan took the opportunity to stand up and back away, slowly.

"Well," she said in a pitch much higher than she had intended. "I'll let you get back to….whatever you were doing. I just wanted to check up on you."

"I appreciate it," Kate smiled.

"If you ever want to talk about it," Megan continued. "I mean…Erica…or Beverly…or you know, none of the above, but…"

Kate shook her head and laughed again, that throaty, deep sound that sent little shivers straight to wear Megan needed it most. She couldn't help herself. She found Megan's discomfort adorable, as twisted as it was.

"Thanks," Kate told her, then added a little more boldly. "I'm available too. To talk, that is. About anything."

Megan bit her lip and nodded before she left, heading back to the lab, absolutely certain she wouldn't be able to focus on anything but those last few words.

* * *

"You gotta be kidding me," Curtis shook his head as two bodies were rolled into the lab. "Double homicide on Christmas Eve?"

"Doesn't make any difference," Peter sighed, standing by with his camera ready. "Murderers don't exactly know how to put their blood-thirsty tendencies on hold."

"What do we have?" Megan walked into the lab, pulling gloves on as she approached one of the tables.

"Two young men, found in the alley behind Flaherty's bar," Bud informed them. "At first we thought they shot each other, but the angle's wrong. Looks like an execution."

"And, that's my cue," Megan began gently lifting the shoulders, prodding the skin, looking for more clues. "We'll take it from here."

"You mean I get to go home to my family?" He smiled. "Don't have to tell me twice."

Megan worked with Peter for a couple hours, combing through each victim's hair, removing trace from their fingernails and from around the gunshot wounds, compiling evidence until it was almost dark. Peter insisted they call it a day. No one expected them to solve a murder on Christmas. Still, Megan wanted to get as much taken care of as possible before the weekend. She told Peter to go on ahead while she stayed behind.

Thinking she was the only one left in the office, she took her time sealing up all the evidence bags, marking them and putting the bodies back in the morgue. Just as she was sliding the last drawer shut, she heard heels clicking down the hall, stopping a few feet behind her.

Megan's heart began to race. She and Kate had been flirting so obviously, so painfully all week long. It was only a matter of time before they found themselves alone together, and yet, she had no idea what to expect. Part of her feared they'd just pretend like nothing was happening, and the other part knew they were on the brink of…something. She mustered up every ounce of control she had left as she slowly turned around.

"What are you still doing here?" Kate asked, arms folded across her chest.

"Lacey's with Todd tonight," Megan answered. "I don't get her till the morning."

"So you decided to work until the last minute," Kate smiled a little, shaking her head as she took a few steps forward. "Why am I not surprised?"

Megan smirked, leaning back against the cold, metal wall.

"You think you've got me all figured out, huh?"

"Actually, no," Kate swallowed. "I stopped trying to figure you out."

Megan's eyebrows rose. She didn't know if she was supposed to take offense or not.

"Good," she sighed. "It's just as well. I don't need to be analyzed."

Kate rolled her eyes as she followed the redhead out of the morgue.

"Megan," she said when they reached the redhead's office. "Megan, stop…"

"What?" she barked, turning around and leaning against her desk, panicking.

Kate stepped closer again.

"It's been a rough couple of weeks," the blonde argued. "I don't need to be pushed right now."

"I think you do," Megan breathed, trying to keep her composure, but failing as she felt her face fill with color. She knew she was about to say things without thinking, but her tongue was working before she could stop it. "You're playing games with me, and I don't like it."

Kate looked anywhere but into Megan's eyes. She felt them getting closer, like magnets, and yet she was still so afraid of rejection, she was holding on to every last bit of self-preservation.

"What do you want from me?" she finally asked, shrugging her shoulders as she continued to cross her arms. Megan could see she was shaking, and it melted right through her resolve.

She got up from the desk, meeting the blonde in the center of the room, stopping just inches away. She could smell Kate's perfume, along with that sweet, intoxicating scent that started to make her mouth water every time they were close.

"I want you to tell me what you're thinking," Megan whispered. "I want you to let me in, for once."

Kate was breathing hard. She couldn't believe they were having this conversation, even if it was still mostly in code. She refused to look at Megan, but couldn't escape the hints of red she saw floating in front of her, or the sound of her black leather pants rubbing together as she shifted just inches away.

"What if you don't like what you see?" Kate finally spoke, almost inaudibly.

Megan shook her head.

"Remember what I said? About not hiding the real you?" she reminded her. "I already like what I see."

Kate sucked in a deep breath and then exhaled, slowly bringing her bright blue eyes back to Megan's. She was relieved to see Megan's face was just as flushed.

"Please tell me I'm not crazy," Megan whispered. "I mean, I know I'm a little crazy, but…"

"You're not crazy," Kate whispered back.

Megan's smile widened, turning a little more confident. Kate reached out and brushed some of Megan's red locks behind her ear, fingers trembling as the woman closed her eyes. Megan reached up with her own hand and felt for Kate's cheek, relishing in the warm, soft skin she found there, before trailing her fingers to her neck, feeling her pulse race.

"We can't," Kate continued to protest weakly, her breath hitting Megan's lips.

"I think we can," Megan breathed.

Kate felt the faintest tickle against her lips. Megan allowed them to brush just barely, as if there was a silk screen between them that was slowly dissolving. Finally, Kate closed her eyes and pushed into her, letting her full, warm pout capture Megan's. She felt all the tension drain from her body as the redhead threw her arms behind her back, pulling her tight as she slipped her lips against Kate's, moaning ever so softly. Kate cupped Megan's cheeks with her hands and kissed her harder, no longer able to wait before sliding her tongue into her mouth. It was greeted readily by Megan's own tongue, hungrily lapping, stroking against it as she pulled Kate towards the couch by the window.

Kate fell on top of Megan, straddling her legs as she let their bodies mold together. Megan's leather pants squeaked against the leather of the couch as she shifted beneath Kate's weight, all the while grabbing onto her back and kissing, kissing like she needed to kiss in order to breathe. Kate's hands worked their way down Megan's blouse, cupping her breasts, which elicited another deep sigh from Megan. Kate smiled against her lips, bringing her hands back up into her hair as she slowed their kisses, savoring every fraction of a centimeter where their bodies touched.

"You okay?" Kate whispered.

"Uh huh," Megan breathed sharply. "You?"

Kate nodded.

"What if someone comes back here?" Megan suddenly thought.

"It's Christmas Eve," Kate shook her head. "You and I are the only two people who would be anywhere near work."

Megan smiled again, that same smile she'd given Kate last week when she left her office after consoling her. Kate swallowed as she looked down into Megan's gorgeous face, bringing her fingers to her lips, tracing them slowly. Megan's smile turned into her usual devilish smirk, and she brought one of Kate's digits into her mouth, sucking on it, letting her tongue circle it, before letting it go. She felt Kate press into her with her thighs, grinding down almost against her will. Megan grabbed her by the waist and pulled their chests together again, kissing her fiercely. Kate slid her hands underneath Megan's shirt, feeling her tight stomach, exploring every inch of her skin before lifting the blouse completely off and over Megan's head.

"When I said I'd never done this before," Megan swallowed. "I wasn't kidding."

"I know," Kate whispered, running her nails over the swells of Megan's breasts, tickling. "Are you sure you…"

"Yes," she kissed her again, holding her tightly. "God yes."

Kate pulled back so she could look into Megan's eyes. She was sure she saw love reflected there. She wanted to know for sure, but at the same time, part of her was afraid the woman beneath her would still run if pushed too fast. Besides, Megan looked like she was ready to explode if she didn't get some kind of relief. They had been teasing each other for years, and it was almost too much to finally have it come out all at once.

"Okay," Kate kissed her.

Megan nodded, opening her mouth again to let Kate's tongue inside, where she kissed her deeply, so deeply, Megan began squirming beneath her again. Kate kept their eyes locked as she kissed her way down Megan's chest, pulling off her bra and dropping it to the floor next to them. She looked down at the perfectly round breasts, held them, squeezed them, pushed them together as she trailed her tongue between them, all while being urged to continue by the sweet, near desperate sounds Megan made. Megan buried her hands in Kate's hair, gently massaging her scalp as Kate brought one of Megan's tightly wound nipples in her mouth, sucking hard before biting down.

"Ungh," Megan moaned. "Kate. Jesus…"

Kate knew it had to feel good as Megan's hips rose beneath her, trying to get as much pressure as she could. Kate laughed a little against Megan's chest, continuing to flick her tongue.

"You're so impatient," the blonde growled playfully.

Megan lifted her hips again, throwing her head back a little.

"I think… we've wait long enough," she sighed.

Kate couldn't have agreed more. She continued her way down Megan's stomach, licking, sucking, teasing towards her belly button. Megan giggled and shifted away from her, but Kate pinned her down and kept licking. She let up just long enough to undo Megan's leather pants, which Megan helped peel down her legs and shake off. Megan wrapped her bare, muscular legs around Kate's waist again and pulled herself up onto Kate's lap, circling her arms around her neck and kissing Kate so hard, so frantically, the blonde thought their lips might start to bleed.

"I can't believe we're doing this," Kate whispered against her mouth. "I've wanted you for so long. I can't even tell you."

"Show me," Megan sighed, as she undid the last button of Kate's shirt and pulled it down her shoulders. "Please."

Kate grabbed Megan's hands and brought them to her back, guiding them towards the clasp of her bra. Megan undid it and quickly removed the lingerie before looking down at Kate's incredibly ample breasts, glistening with sweat. Megan smirked as she bent down and licked between them, moaning at the salty smoothness of Kate's skin. The blonde closed her eyes and allowed herself, finally, to feel.

Megan sucked on her breasts for what felt like forever, until Kate couldn't take it anymore. She knew what Megan wanted and she wanted to give it to her. She lowered the redhead back down against the couch and brought her fingers to the waistband of Megan's panties. Megan shook her head approvingly, and Kate pulled them down her thighs, jaw hanging open slightly as she eyed the patch of soft red curls for the first time. She still couldn't believe this was happening.

"So beautiful," Kate swallowed. "You are so incredibly beautiful, Megan."

Megan rolled her eyes as she smiled, arching her back, motioning for Kate to come closer. The blonde hovered, bringing their noses together for a second before kissing her, letting her hands roam all over Megan's body, trying to commit every part to memory. Megan shook, pulling Kate's face against her ear.

"Please," she repeated.

Kate let go of Megan's shoulders and positioned herself between her legs, pulling them around her again as she lowered herself to be eye level with Megan's ridiculously wet center. Kate ran her fingers through the hair and felt Megan buzz with anticipation, shifting her hips closer to her face. Kate smiled, feeling herself get even wetter at her eagerness. She brought both hands to Megan's swollen folds, feeling their soft, sticky slickness, before spreading them gently with her fingers as Megan continued to come undone.

Kate finally brought her lips to her labia and kissed her, just as fully and abundantly as she had kissed her mouth, pressing her generous lips into the folds, breathing into her, all while Megan shook uncontrollably beneath her. Kate couldn't believe how open and ready the woman was for someone who was so guarded only weeks ago. Now here they were, Kate sliding her tongue against the hot, pulsing flesh between Megan's thighs. She licked her clitoris furiously, expertly, speeding up until she thought Megan was about to climax, then slowing down, teasing as she brought her hands to her ass and squeezed, digging in her nails while savoring her deliciously. Megan's head thrashed back and forth against the leather.

"Fuck," she cried. "Kate, oh my…fuck. Please, just…"

Kate felt her own juices dripping down her thighs at the sound of Megan begging. She picked up the pace again, flicking her tongue against the little red nub until Megan was gasping, gripping Kate's shoulders, and finally groaning wildly as she came. She continued to pant as Kate licked up every bit of her.

"Kate…" Megan sighed. The blonde returned to her face and kissed her lips, letting Megan taste herself, which seemed to only drive her further towards madness.

Just then, the elevator dinged.

The two shot up immediately.

"Cleaning crew," Kate suddenly remembered. "Shit."

"On Christmas?" Megan whispered, pulling her pants back on.

"Yes, Megan. Some people don't get holidays off," she reminded her as she quickly buttoned up her shirt.

They got themselves decent and sitting on the couch next to each other in record time, almost looking chaste, just as the man walked by with his mop and waved to them. Megan couldn't help but giggle under her breath, feeling bad, but unable to ignore the insanity of the situation. Kate glared at her, but Megan could tell she wasn't that upset.

"So…" Megan sighed. "That was…"

She was at a loss, again.

"Good?" Kate asked, knowing it was an understatement.

Megan smiled, hoping she could communicate with her eyes, just as they had for so long. It was clear Kate understood that it was better than good.

"It's Christmas Eve," Megan continued.

"Uh huh," Kate smirked.

"Got any plans?"

The blonde's face went blank. She usually sat at home watching old movies on holidays, eating whatever she felt like, not worrying about calories for once. But she was always, most certainly, alone.

Somehow, Megan must have guessed what was going through her brain, as she reached out and grabbed Kate's hand, rubbing her thumb against her palm.

"I've got a box of Oreos at home," Megan offered. "They were supposed to be for Santa, but since Lacey doesn't believe anymore, I don't think he'll mind if we steal a few."

Kate couldn't help but laugh. She stole a brief kiss and shook her head yes before they made their way down the elevator and into their cars.

* * *

Before Megan knew it, they were in her apartment, losing their clothes again on the way into the bedroom. For any other two people, it would have seemed too fast. But for Megan and Kate, their entire relationship had been foreplay, everything leading up to this. They were more than ready.

Once Megan was fully stripped down, she fell back onto the sheets and rested on her elbows, looking up at the blonde with the most intensely confident, erotic gaze Kate had ever seen.

"Come here," she breathed hard.

Kate climbed on top of her and crashed her lips into the redhead's, squeezing her breasts, running her fingers up and down her lightly freckled arms and legs, as Megan worked at tearing off the rest of Kate's clothes. Seconds later, they were both completely naked, straddling each other as the lights from the city danced across their faces through the window. Megan wiped a sweaty blonde lock from Kate's cheek, kissing where it had lain, before meeting her eyes. She held Kate's face in her hands and took a deep breath.

"I've never felt like this," Megan panted. "About anyone."

Kate shook her head, clearly agreeing. She kissed Megan so softly, so sweetly, they both knew that even though they were too raw and exposed at the moment to say the words, they were absolutely in love with each other. The words would come. Right now, there were more pressing issues.

Megan took Kate's hand and guided it back down between them. Kate helped her out, amazed at how wet she still was after already coming. She teased Megan's entrance with her fingers as she nibbled on her lips. Slowly, she shoved one finger, followed by another, and another, deep inside Megan's core.

Megan's nipples went even harder than before as she closed her eyes and rolled her neck, bringing her mouth to Kate's shoulder and biting down. Kate sighed sharply, then moaned when she felt Megan's fingers searching through her own soaking wet lips. It took her a few seconds to find the opening, but when she did, Kate spread her legs a little further and welcomed Megan inside.

The redhead gasped at the new sensation. She mimicked Kate's motions, sliding in and out until they found themselves synched in their rhythm. The two moved their hips wildly, impaling themselves on each other, thrusting as deeply as they could as their breasts bounced and slipped together, nipples grazing. Kate used her free hand to gently grab the back of Megan's neck, holding her in place against her forehead, while Megan grabbed onto Kate's waist and tried to get as much of a grip as she could through the sweat.

"Gaah!" Megan gasped, letting out noises that were nowhere close to words. Kate bit down on Megan's neck, sucking hard as her eyes narrowed and she breathed heavily through her nose. Finally, Kate brought their lips together again, kissing rampantly, as she felt her walls clench around Megan's fingers.

"Oh my…nngh…" Kate lost control of language as her entire body shook, toes tingling as she met her orgasm. Megan's followed seconds later, and the two collapsed against the pillows.

Several minutes passed while they collected themselves. Megan eventually untangled their limbs and crawled back up Kate's body, stopping to kiss her shoulder, before bringing herself to lie against her chest. The blonde wrapped her arms around the redhead and relished in the feeling of their heartbeats mingling, the smell of her shampoo, the way she breathed shallowly against her skin. She took note of their position and smirked.

"How'd you end up on top?"

Megan shrugged. "It's in my nature, I suppose."

Kate lifted Megan's chin and stared down into her green orbs. Megan smiled up at her, swallowing a little as they both came out of their sex haze.

"You still okay?" Kate had to ask.

"Perfect," Megan sighed.

They kissed for a few more minutes before repositioning themselves, Megan lying next to Kate with her arm draped over her stomach.

"What do we do now?" Megan asked.

"You mean…?" Kate wasn't sure what she meant.

"I mean, with work," Megan clarified. "This sort of complicates things, doesn't it?"

"It doesn't have to," Kate insisted. "It's not like we weren't fighting like a couple before."

Megan's eyebrow rose. _Did she say…_

"Did you say 'couple?'" she smirked.

Kate bit her lip, realizing maybe she'd assumed too much.

"I just figured…" Kate tried to explain. "I didn't think either of us would go for it if we weren't…"

"Yes," Megan cut her off with a long kiss.

"Yes?" Kate responded when they came up for air. "Yes what?"

"Yes," Megan licked Kate's lips playfully. "To what you were going to ask me."

Kate looked at her incredulously.

"What if I wasn't?"

"Then I'd ask you," Megan smiled.

Kate shook her head again and giggled, then looked at her more seriously.

"Okay," she replied. "Yes."

"Good," Megan grinned. "Because I don't think I could handle watching you run around with someone else again."

Kate rolled her eyes, thinking of Erica only for a brief moment, feeling grateful for her in a way, before lying on her side and returning her attention to Megan.

"You don't have to worry," Kate whispered. "I'm all yours."

Megan swallowed, eyes threatening to fill up with tears. She kept them in check though, playing it off by kissing the blonde passionately, thankfully.

"Why now?" Megan wondered. "After all this time, what changed between us?"

Kate shrugged, thinking, wanting to make sure she said it just right.

"I realized…I couldn't keep trying to make things happen with other people, when the only person I really wanted was you," she gulped, deciding to just be honest. "I didn't think I could have you, didn't think you'd ever want it to be like this, but somewhere along the way I started to consider maybe you'd give me a chance."

"How could you not know I would?" Megan reached for her hand, lacing their fingers. "I risked everything to get that vaccine, even got Charlie Stafford to lose his job over trying to save you. I would have done anything."

"Is that when it changed for you?" Kate asked.

Megan nodded.

"I knew I was attracted to you before. But then…when I thought you were…I couldn't even imagine," she tried to shake off those thoughts. Kate brought their noses together again, nuzzling her face and kissing her gently.

"You did save me," Kate whispered. "I can never thank you enough."

"This was a good start," Megan smirked.

They continued to hold each other until they both started drifting to sleep. Megan knew Lacey would be there early in the morning. She had no idea how she'd explain Kate spending the night, but couldn't worry about it now. She curled up tightly against the blonde and shut her eyes, ready to indulge in the best sleep of her life.

"Merry Christmas, Kate," Megan whispered.


	7. Chapter 7

The alarm went off at eight. Lacey would be there by nine. Megan hit snooze once before rolling over and feeling another warm figure in the bed next to her. She slowly opened her eyes, coming back to consciousness, remembering.

Watching Kate sleep was divine. She looked angelic, her blonde waves tousled across her face, full red lips slightly parted as she breathed. Megan noted the rise and fall of her chest beneath the sheets, her tan shoulders peaking out, begging to be touched. She softly traced her fingers along Kate's collar bone, then up to her neck, her chin, and finally her lips. The blonde began to smirk a little at her touch, stretching. Megan decided to capture her first waking breath with a kiss, gently sucking her bottom lip until she felt Kate smile into it and reciprocate. Kate brought her fingers to Megan's hair, brushing through it, playing with the tresses enveloping them both. When Megan finally pulled away, Kate opened her eyes, still looking very sleepy. She stretched her arms out and wrapped them around Megan's neck, tangling their legs together.

"Hey," she whispered.

"Hey," Megan breathed back.

"What time is it?"

"Time to make breakfast," Megan sighed. "Christmas tradition."

Kate swallowed, realizing she would be taking part in family traditions, something she had never actually experienced in her own family. At least, she hoped she would be invited to stay.

"Do you think…" she began hesitantly. "Will Lacey be okay with…"

"I have no idea," Megan admitted. "But I'm not letting you go anywhere, so she'll have to be."

Kate still looked concerned. She had a good relationship with Lacey when she and Todd were together, and even before then. The girl seemed to look up to her, but that was when it came to fashion and homework advice. She had no idea how Lacey might react to her dating her mother.

"Hey," Megan cupped Kate's chin and looked into her eyes assuredly. "Trust me. It'll be alright."

Kate softened, letting the redhead calm her nerves for the moment, kissing lazily up the sides of her face, across her forehead, before returning to her lips. She felt Megan's thigh push between her legs, nestling there amidst the warm, sticky space. Kate's breath caught at the sensation, letting her hands roam down to Megan's ass, which had distracted her so many times back at the office, whether she was wearing a short dress or tight pants. It begged to be grabbed, and now, she did so with full abandon, squeezing firmly as Megan continued to roll her hips.

"Gotta get up," Megan kissed her cheek abruptly and jumped out of bed, leaving her shaking. Kate scoffed and rolled her eyes, taking pains to sit up. She watched Megan bend over in front of her dresser, totally nude, taunting her as she pulled some sweats out of a drawer. She tossed a pair to Kate, along with a t-shirt, and slipped on her own before venturing out into the kitchen.

Kate got dressed and followed a few minutes later. She took note of all the festive decorations she missed last night when they were desperately ripping off each other's clothes. The tree next to the sofa was filled with brightly colored bulbs, sparkly reds, greens and blues, and a number of homemade ornaments Lacey had constructed over the years. There were presents wrapped and already sitting under the tree, and a number of surfaces were covered in snowmen, reindeer, tinsel and garland.

"Wow. You guys really go all out," Kate noted as she met Megan near the refrigerator, where she was removing ingredients.

"All Lacey," Megan sighed. "Before she moved back in, I didn't do any of it. It's kind of a hassle."

"I think it's nice," Kate admitted softly, leaning against the counter. "I didn't have any of this growing up."

"You didn't celebrate Christmas?"

"Not exactly," Kate swallowed. "My parents were usually too boozed up to worry about things like holidays."

Megan froze. She felt a little sick to her stomach at the thought of Kate's parents not treating her right, remembering the other allusions to neglect and abuse Kate had mentioned. She stopped what she was doing for a moment and stood in front of her, arms wrapped around her slender waist, locking behind her back.

"I hope you know…" Megan whispered, planting a soft kiss on Kate's jawline. "There's nothing you can tell me that will make me change my mind about you."

Kate shifted uncomfortably, though she tipped her head forward and leaned it against Megan's, bringing her hands to her face.

"You say that," she mumbled.

"I mean it," Megan told her firmly. She lifted Kate's chin and kissed her so lovingly, Kate felt her knees buckle, still a little wobbly with sleep. She gripped harder onto Megan's waist and pushed her back against the opposite counter, deepening their kiss, whipping her tongue inside her mouth and smoothing it against every surface.

Megan was taken aback by the sudden fervor, but she welcomed it. She allowed herself to be lifted onto the counter so she could wrap her legs behind Kate's back. Kate brought her fingers to the waistband of Megan's grey sweatpants and looked into her eyes fiendishly.

"How much time do we have?" Kate whispered.

"Not much…but…" she pulled Kate's hands away from her, slipping off the counter. Kate looked at her, confused, until she felt Megan's thumbs loop beneath her own sweats, beneath the waist of her panties, locking eyes with her as she slid them down her legs.

"Now who's playing games?" Kate trembled, arching an eyebrow as she smirked.

"You want me to stop?" Megan growled, grabbing Kate's mound firmly. Kate's eyelids fluttered. Megan began dragging her fingers through her slickness. The blonde shuddered, shaking her head as Megan pushed her back against the marble, diving in with two fingers, filling her up. Kate spread her legs just enough to give Megan the space she needed, barely able to think as Megan fucked her slowly while standing. Kate hung onto Megan's shoulders, marveling at the redhead's strength as she kept them from falling.

"Meg…" Kate huffed against her neck, unable to form a complete sentence. "What…"

"God, you feel so good," Megan whispered against her cheek, continuing to thrust in and out as Kate finally pushed herself up onto the counter.

"You're so…" Kate continued. "So…"

Megan removed her fingers from Kate's dripping core and instead lifted her legs over her shoulders, thankful they were at the perfect height to do this. Kate leaned back against the cabinets as Megan brought her lips to her cunt, lapping up all of her flavor, tickling and teasing every crevice as if she had done this before, though Kate knew she hadn't. It was simply a matter of wanting someone so badly she had no qualms or hesitations about how to proceed.

Kate looked down between them and watched as Megan darted her tongue out against her swollen clit, evidently loving what she tasted, gazing up indulgently through hooded eyes. The blonde squirmed and did her best to keep her balance. Finally, Megan stopped teasing and turned to a full on assault with her mouth, licking harder and faster, until Kate was practically screaming.

"Yes! Oh god…ungh!"

She grabbed Megan's shoulders and dug her feet into her back as she came. Megan traced her nails up Kate's thighs before wiping her mouth with her hand, sucking Kate off her fingers before standing up straight. She pulled Kate against her and kissed her over and over again, until they were left just staring, unable to look away.

"How did you…" Kate continued to pant. "You're… so much…"

"Naughtier than you imagined?" Megan smirked.

Kate shook her head and giggled.

"I feel like," Megan kissed between words. "I've been waiting for you. Forever."

Kate held her cheek and stroked it with her thumb, searching those green eyes, wanting to tell her how much she loved her, but still feeling scared. She'd never loved someone without losing them, whether it was her mom and dad, or various romantic relationships throughout the years. And she'd certainly never loved someone this much. She simply couldn't bring herself to say it, not yet. They'd see how the day went with Lacey. Then, maybe she'd be ready.

* * *

The two made their best effort to get cleaned up quickly. Megan returned to the stove, making a big bowl of scrambled eggs and some fried potatoes to go with them. A few minutes before nine, while Kate was still in the shower, she heard Lacey's key in the door.

"Merry Christmas!" the young girl yelled cheerfully as she threw her bags on the floor, eyeing the gifts beneath the tree.

"Merry Christmas!" Megan called back from the kitchen.

Lacey wrapped her arms around her mother from behind and squeezed her tight as Megan turned around and kissed her on the forehead.

"When's grandma coming over?" Lacey asked.

Megan's heart almost stopped. She completely forgot about her mother. Joan would probably be there closer to ten. _Great_, she thought. _As if Kate isn't already nervous enough._

"Later," Megan swallowed. "You want your bagel toasted?"

Lacey nodded, taking a seat at the bar as she watched her mother cook.

"Do we have to wait for her to open presents?"

Megan turned around and scowled at her, making the answer obvious.

Suddenly, a small thump was heard coming from the bedroom, the sound of Kate stubbing her toe, followed by an "Ouch!"

Lacey's ears perked up, then her eyebrows lifted as she looked back at her mother. Megan held a spatula in the air, her face bright red.

"Mom?" Lacey questioned. "Who…"

"Lace, it's kind of…"

"I didn't know you were seeing someone new!" she whispered a little excitedly. "Let alone having them sleep over. On Christmas. It must be serious. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because… it's…" Megan didn't know what to say. How could she tell her fifteen year old the truth? That she and her boss—her father's ex, to boot—had been secretly falling head over heels for each other for years and finally decided to throw caution to the wind, having crazy, amazing sex without considering any of the consequences?

She didn't have to say anything though, as the door to the bedroom opened and Kate stepped out, back in her grey slacks and light pink button down from the night before, hair a little wet, wearing very light makeup. She looked at Lacey, then at Megan, and the three exchanged looks for a few seconds before Lacey finally spoke.

"Kate?" she asked. "What are you…?"

Lacey's eyes seemed to flash through several emotions as she answered her own question. First confusion, then embarrassment followed by a sort of disgruntled teenage apathy. Kate looked at her sympathetically while Megan continued to pray the bottom wasn't about to fall out before they'd even had a chance.

"Lacey," Megan tried. "Kate and I…we just…"

"You know what?" Lacey smiled, a little disingenuous but not mean-spirited. "You guys are adults. I don't need to know everything."

Megan looked at her incredulously. There was no way her daughter was being this mature about it. She'd hoped for a more enthusiastic response, but at least she wasn't running out the door.

"So you're…okay with me joining you today?" Kate tried to get clarification, wanting to make sure it was cool that she stayed.

"The more the merrier," Lacey continued to smile, turning red as she rolled her eyes.

Kate looked at Megan, who licked her lips and turned back to the stove, pulling the potatoes off the burner. The blonde took a seat next to Lacey and tried to make things more comfortable.

"How was last night?" she asked.

"Nice," Lacey shrugged. "You know dad. He can't cook anything, but we had some good takeout."

Kate nodded.

"And school?"

"Fine," Lacey added.

There was silence for a few moments, until Lacey seemed to remember something. She bit her lip, then smirked.

"My friend Sarah just started dating this girl Maddie."

"Oh?" Megan coughed before clearing her throat, still working with her back towards them.

"Yeah. We all thought she totally liked Kevin Wilks, but it turns out she goes both ways."

She eyed Kate a little more boldly. Kate swallowed.

"Are you okay with that?" Kate asked. "I mean, your friend."

"Yeah," Lacey shrugged. "People love who they love. We can't really help it."

Kate was starting to find peace within, her heart rate returning to a reasonable level. Lacey was a smart girl. Clearly, she wasn't ready to talk about this situation, but she was trying, in her own way, to show that she would be supportive eventually, once she wrapped her brain around how it all must have gone down.

Megan was sort of shell-shocked, keeping herself busy, like she did at work when she needed to stay sane. She wasn't surprised at Lacey's reaction. She just hoped that when they had a little time together one-on-one, they'd be able to discuss things more candidly.

"You want a mimosa?" Megan asked.

"Yes, please!" both Kate and Lacey answered.

Megan glared at her daughter.

"Not you, silly."

"Why not?" Lacey continued to push. "I think I've earned it."

"Nice try," Megan shook her head, then turned to Kate.

"Maybe I should pass too," Kate changed her mind.

"Oh, I'd take one if I were you," Megan smirked. "Lacey reminded me that my mother will be here shortly. You're gonna need all the help you can get."

Kate guffawed a little, taking a deep breath as her face flushed. Lacey put her hand on her shoulder and patted.

"Don't worry," the girl smiled kindly now. "She's more socially awkward than my mom. There's no way she'll get it."

Kate couldn't help but laugh. Megan just shook her head, glaring at them both as she sat down at the counter.

* * *

After about twenty minutes, Joan finally made an appearance.

"Yes!" Lacey jumped up, hugging her grandmother and pulling her towards the couch. "Presents!"

"Heavens," Joan chuckled, throwing off her coat and joining her granddaughter by the tree. "You're getting too old for this, Lace. Soon you're only going to want checks."

"Don't rush things, mother," Megan smiled, giving her mom a brief hug. Joan eyed Kate standing next to her and cocked her head to the side.

"Dr. Murphy. What a surprise."

"Merry Christmas, Joan," Kate shook the former judge's hand as Joan turned back to Megan, waiting for further explanation.

"I asked Kate to spend the day with us," Megan gave the short answer.

"I see," Joan smiled politely. "Well, we're happy to have you. Is your family out of state?"

Kate swallowed.

"Actually, my family… parents…are both dead." Kate didn't want to bring the mood down further by having to explain the details, so she figured she should just say they were gone and end the conversation.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry," Joan apologized, embarrassed.

"Come on," Megan interrupted, handing Lacey her first gift to open. "Lacey's been driving me crazy since she got here."

They spent the remainder of the day opening presents, watching _A Christmas Story_ three and half times, and listening to all the latest society gossip. At about four o'clock, Joan headed off to another party. Lacey stepped into her room for a while to call her friends and compare gifts, leaving Megan and Kate some time to check in with each other.

"I think that went well," Megan sighed, reaching for Kate's hand across the couch. The blonde held it loosely.

"Did it?"

"I mean, considering she has no idea, and I didn't think this was a good time to tell her, yes. I'd say it went great," Megan confirmed.

Kate tried not to let Megan see how overwhelmed she was. This was a lot to take in at once.

"Do you think there will ever be a good time to tell her?"

"How about after she's had some of her bourbon-infused jam?" Megan laughed. "We'll tell her then. She'll be fine."

Kate swallowed. Joan had always been nice to her, at least in a superficial way. She knew it wouldn't look great that she'd left Todd and presumably bounced right over to Megan, though that was a grossly abridged version of the story. She and Megan knew there was so much more to it than that, but to others—Joan, Lacey, Todd, their co-workers, the Commissioner—it had to look pretty sordid. She tried not to care, but it was weighing on her.

"Are your parents really dead?" Megan asked, interrupting Kate's thoughts.

"I don't know, actually," Kate answered. "I haven't seen my mother since I was six. My father, last time I checked, was in and out of halfway houses and shelters. That was almost a decade ago."

"Jesus," Megan shook her head, scooting closer to the blonde, rubbing the back of her hand. "I can't even imagine how hard that must be."

"It was," Kate noted coolly. "But I've accepted it. Made me fight harder for everything I have."

"I'm sure," Megan brushed some of Kate's bangs off her face before bringing her lips to her ear. "Thank you for telling me."

Kate shifted, pulling back a little, wanting to stop herself, but needing to just…

"What's wrong?" Megan asked.

"Nothing," Kate insisted, squeezing Megan's hand, lying blatantly. "I…Lacey…how do you think she's doing?"

"Right now it's hard to tell," Megan shrugged. "One minute she's sulking, the next she's as sweet as can be. She seems to adore you, though. No surprise there."

"She's a kid, Megan," Kate reminded her. "Kid's see things differently sometimes."

Megan looked at her rather seriously, but softly, trying to grasp what the blonde was thinking.

"How do you see things?" she finally asked.

Kate shook her head, not sure what to say. There wasn't anything to say, except that she was scared of losing credibility in her position, and more crucially, of getting hurt. Her only defense mechanism was to back away until she felt like she could construct some sort of emotional armor that would still allow her to love and be loved.

"Is it Erica?" Megan swallowed. "You still haven't told me what…"

"No, Megan, it isn't Erica," Kate quickly corrected, rolling her eyes. "Even she saw how much I wanted you. That's part of why she left. It's not that, and it's not you. It's just me needing some time. Is that okay?"

Megan didn't want to be angry. She didn't want to panic. She figured the best thing she could do was give Kate her time and space, even though everything in her head and heart screamed that this was the rightest thing that had ever happened.

"Okay," Megan whispered.

Kate rose from the couch and picked up her purse.

"You're leaving?" Megan asked, still surprised.

"I think you and Lacey should spend time together, talk about everything," Kate suggested. "Let me know what she says."

Megan kept her protestations to herself and met her at the door. Kate hated the look on Megan's face, but didn't know what else to do. She needed to get some perspective. She reached out and pulled Megan into a very long, gut-wrenching hug.

Megan hated this. She didn't know why the blonde was pulling away all of a sudden. She realized they'd gone from zero to sixty in a matter of hours, but she thought they were on the same page. When she looked into Kate's eyes now, she still thought she saw love there, unmistakably. But she also saw hesitation, and fear, all things she hoped Kate would be able to exorcise with a little reflection.

"I'll see you Monday," Kate whispered.

She kissed Megan once more on the lips, and then she was gone.


	8. Chapter 8

Megan knocked on Lacey's door, hoping she'd be ready to talk.

"Come in," Lacey called out.

"Hey," Megan smiled sadly, sitting on Lacey's bed while she wrapped up her conversation with her friend Lindsey, hanging up and continuing to paint her nails with one of the new polishes she'd gotten in her stocking. "Where's Kate?"

"She went home."

"What?" Lacey asked, confused. "Why?"

"She said she needed time to think about things," Megan sighed, feeling like she probably shouldn't lay out all her problems to her daughter, but knowing Lacey was a very good listener.

"You think grandma was too much?"

Megan tried to laugh a little. "Grandma's always too much."

"True," Lacey giggled. "But…she didn't have to leave. It's still Christmas."

"Well, she wanted to," Megan swallowed. "Hopefully she'll figure things out soon."

"I hope so too," Lacey agreed. She appeared to think for a few moments as she put her nail polish aside. "Mom?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't have a problem with you dating a woman," Lacey told her bluntly.

Megan blushed a little.

"No?"

"No... I mean, I get it. I didn't know you had those kinds of feelings, but it's not a big deal. At all."

Megan took a very deep breath, feeling thankful for the way society was changing, helping shape the consciousness of her daughter and others her age, hopefully making things easier for them than they were for her own generation.

"I appreciate that," Megan smiled.

"But…" Lacey continued. "_Kate's _your boss. And she dated dad. And…"

"I know, I know," Megan held up her hand. "It's complicated, yes, but that's the way it is. I tried, I really did, but something kept pulling us towards each other until we couldn't stay away."

"Do you love her?" Lacey asked. Megan admired how to-the-point kids could be. It was beyond refreshing.

"Yes," she admitted aloud for the first time. "I do."

"Then you should tell her," Lacey stated firmly.

"I don't know if she's ready to hear it."

"She has to be," Lacey argued. "I never saw her look at dad the way she looks at you. We'd talk about love sometimes, whenever I had stupid crushes on guys at school. But she always talked about it like it was something she hadn't found yet. She'd get that look in her eyes though, the same one she had today every time you spoke. She was staring at you."

Megan felt her cheeks turn pink at the assertion.

"Lace, I don't…"

"Tell her," Lacey repeated. "It's the only way you'll know for sure. I don't want you to get hurt."

"I don't want to get hurt either," Megan sniffed.

Lacey threw her arms around her mom. Megan knew she was right. She would tell Kate, whether she was ready to hear it or not. Megan was ready to say it, and after all they'd been through, she knew there was no time like the present.

"Can you drop me off at Lindsey's on your way?" Lacey pleaded sweetly. "Please? They're going caroling."

Megan shook her head and sighed, but agreed.

* * *

Back in her own apartment, Kate curled up in front of the television and turned on _It's a Wonderful Life._ The movie made her terribly depressed every time she watched it, but she couldn't help herself. She felt like she'd become accustomed, almost addicted, to a certain kind of sadness. It was what she knew best.

Holidays were never an easy time, and experiencing so much joy all at once made her uneasy, when she knew it should have made her ecstatic. Being alone with Megan, feeling her body, letting go as they'd entered each other's most intimate physical and psychic realms wasn't so terrifying. That part felt natural, and well worth the wait. It was the other stuff. Being domestic. Having more than one person—a child, other relatives—to share things with. She wasn't used to it, but she wanted to be. She wanted to feel safe, and yet she knew that sometimes, in order to get there, you had to take risks. She felt guilty and embarrassed for leaving, but knew she could make much better decisions if she retreated for the time being.

The truth was, Megan had always been a risk, a liability. But she was one Kate was willing to take.

As the credits started rolling and Kate began to nod off on the couch, there was a knock at her door. Her eyes opened abruptly at the sound. She quickly made her way to answer it in her blue silk robe, checking through the peephole, though she already knew exactly who it was.

"What are you doing here?" Kate asked Megan, stepping aside to let her in. The redhead made her way to the couch and flopped down, removing her heavy winter coat. She had her hair pulled back and was wearing rather plain jeans and a black long sleeved shirt, much more laid back than Kate had ever seen, save for that morning. "Where's Lacey?"

"At her friend's house," Megan told her. "Turns out, people don't stay with their parents every waking minute during the holidays anymore. What I wouldn't have given to get away from my mother on Christmas."

"_That_ I can believe," Kate smirked. "Though I'm sure Lacey didn't want to get away from you. She's just…a teenager."

Kate joined her on the couch, sitting close, but not too close. They both looked at their knees for a few minutes until Megan finally broke the silence.

"I know you said you needed time," Megan swallowed, looking up at her with the thinnest layer of tears in her eyes. "But are we really going to pretend like nothing happened?"

Kate exhaled, closing her eyes, trying to keep her wits about her.

"We have to handle things carefully. You said it yourself."

"And you said not to worry," Megan reminded her.

"I know, Megan," Kate brought her hands together, clasping them in her lap. "But I did a lot of thinking, and I want to make sure we do this the right way. There's a lot at stake, for both of us. I'm not used to feeling so exposed. You saw how uncomfortable I was with Erica. I can't just change overnight."

"I don't want you to change," Megan shook her head, moving a little closer. "I want you exactly as you are. How many times do I have to tell you that before you'll believe me?"

"Megan…"

"No, listen to me," she grabbed her hand. "I don't care if anyone else knows or doesn't know. We don't have to tell people now, or ever. _I _just want to know. I need to know that this means just as much to you as it does to me."

Kate breathed heavily, thinking back on how many times she'd told herself this could never happen. All those layers of denial would take time to shed. But the past twenty four hours had been the most insanely reckless, and yet incredibly romantic and grounding hours of her life. Megan was more than willing to deal with all of her baggage, make compromises and adjustments to allow her in, even allow her to be involved in her daughter's life. She was clearly in it for keeps.

"It does," Kate whispered. "It does mean just as much."

Megan lowered her eyes, then raised them again.

"Lacey made me promise I'd come here after I dropped her off."

"She did?" Kate laughed a little, trying not to let her tears go.

"Yes. She loves you," Megan nodded, letting the moment linger before taking Kate's face in her hands. "I love you."

Kate felt like her heart was in her throat, beating so fiercely it threatened to spill out of her mouth and onto the sofa between them. She was nauseous with how much love she had for the woman in front of her, absolutely sick with love, in the most excruciatingly beautiful way. She wished they'd both had the guts to say it when they were naked and wrapped around each other last night. It would have been much more romantic, but she figured they had plenty of time for that. For now, here it was, right in front of them.

"I love you too," she whispered. "I do. I love you. So much."

Megan pressed their lips together, taking her in, pulling her arms around her. Kate returned the embrace, letting the sense of rightness wash over them, sealing the connection they'd both been kindling for so long. Kate teased Megan's lips with her tongue, balancing between softness and torture, tracing her fingers down her cheeks. Megan finally pulled away, narrowing her eyes and smiling devilishly as she looked down at the coffee table.

"Is that…" she began to ask, smirking. "A half-eaten jar of Nutella?"

Kate pouted her lips and looked a little guilty. Megan laughed hard before grabbing her again, burying her fingers in her blonde locks and pushing her back against the sofa, cuddling up against her chest.

"Well, well, Dr. Murphy," she mused. "You do know how to have fun after all."

The blonde scoffed, pinching Megan's sides as she squirmed. The two made Nutella sandwiches in between love-making sessions until sunrise, feeling like kids again, full of energy and wide awake.


	9. Epilogue

_A year and a half later._

Megan sat in Kate's office and flipped on the TV. She'd told the others she couldn't watch with them, needing enough space to bite her fingernails and curse if she needed to without listening to their commentary. They'd understood, but now, she sort of wished she was in the break room with them, her nerves making her a little dizzy. She leaned against the desk and waited for the love of her life to come on screen as the press conference began.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Kate addressed the public. "I am here today to address Commissioner Travers' nomination of me for Health Commissioner, replacing her after eighteen years of extraordinary dedication and leadership. I could not be more grateful to her for her guidance over the years as I've led the Philadelphia County Medical Examiner's Office, and I am deeply honored by her belief that I have what it takes to fill her shoes."

Megan sighed and licked her lips as she watched, folding her arms across her waist. Sometimes she still couldn't believe this brilliant, articulate, sexier-than-was-really-fair woman had chosen to be with her. She thought about how loud she was last night when they were having sex in the shower, Kate pressed up against the marble tiles, dripping wet as Megan dropped to her knees and licked. She was still surprised how often Kate let her take control, but no more surprised than the woman herself.

She shook her head and returned her attention to the screen.

"That is why it is with mixed emotions that I must decline the nomination," Kate continued, pausing amidst the flashes and buzzing reporters. "The M.E. office, and the people who work not for me, but with me, are home. They are my family, and I couldn't imagine not getting to help save the world with them every day in our own humble, but very important way. I realize this may seem like a foolish decision, turning down a position that many people would die to take on. But I ask Commissioner Travers and whoever does eventually take her place to please allow me to continue to do the work I love. I have absolutely everything I've ever wanted, and I would cherish the chance to be able to stay on where I have never felt more rewarded, accomplished and appreciated for being myself. Thank you."

As soon as Kate finished, at least a dozen questions were thrown at her by the local and state news media, but Megan didn't hear one of them. All she saw was Kate staring directly into the camera for the briefest of moments, flashing those blue eyes and smiling before leaving the podium.


End file.
